Tools to Improve Self-Awareness for Leaders

One of the most dangerous things in leadership? Unaware toxicity. I’ve worked with executives who weren’t trying to be arrogant or controlling. They simply didn’t realize how their presence impacted others. According to Harvard Business Review, 95% of people think they’re self-aware, but only 10-15% actually are. That means most leaders are making decisions, managing teams, and shaping culture with unchecked blind spots. Self-awareness is a strategic advantage. It affects everything. Including how you negotiate, lead under pressure, relate to your team, and handle high-stakes decisions. Here’s something most leaders don’t know: When your emotional intensity hits a 7 out of 10 or higher, your logic drops, even if you’re excited or happy. That’s why emotional awareness is essential. So what does self-awareness actually mean? It means checking in with yourself before walking into a room. Noticing when your body is off, your tone is sharp, or your intentions are misaligned. It means recognizing the ripple effects your reactions have on everyone around you. And this is where the real damage gets done: Some leaders become aware of how they operate and still choose to manipulate. Those are the ones you need to remove from your company entirely. But for those who are willing to do the work? Self-awareness can transform everything. Where is where to start: 1. Interoceptive Awareness Practice sensing your heartbeat and breath during moments of stress. Track your physiological signals. The more aware you are of your internal state, the faster you can self-regulate. 2. Daily Debrief Ask: What emotion drove me today? Where was I reactive? What decisions felt misaligned? Go beyond surface-level journaling and get into emotional cause and effect. 3. Real Feedback Loops Ask peers, not just subordinates, for feedback. Build an environment where people can tell you how you actually come across. 4. Emotional Downshifting Name what you feel. Breathe. Anchor. It takes 60 seconds to shift out of limbic overdrive and into clarity. 5. Empathic Awareness Before your next meeting, ask yourself, “If I were them, how would I experience me right now?” That’s how trust is built in real-time. Self-awareness just might be the most powerful leadership skill of the next decade.

The One Skill That Can Transform Your Leadership in 30 Days Ever feel like you’re constantly putting out fires at work and home, wondering why certain interactions drain you while others energize you? The secret isn’t just working harder—it’s mastering self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and boundaries. Why This Matters: According to research from Harvard Business Review, leaders with high emotional intelligence outperform their peers by 37% in decision-making, conflict resolution, and team engagement. But here’s the catch—most professionals think they’re self-aware, yet only 10-15% actually are. The Hidden Cost of Ignoring This Skill Without self-awareness and clear boundaries: ❌ You absorb everyone else’s stress, leading to burnout. ❌ You overcommit, leaving little time for what truly matters. ❌ You struggle to handle tough conversations, damaging relationships. The 30-Day Self-Awareness Challenge (No Overthinking, Just Action!) 1️⃣ Track Emotional Triggers: Spend 5 minutes daily noting when you feel stressed or drained. Patterns will emerge. 2️⃣ The 3-Second Pause Rule: Before reacting, take 3 seconds to assess: Am I responding or just reacting? 3️⃣ Say ‘No’ Without Guilt: Next time someone asks for your time, pause and ask, Does this align with my priorities? If not, say, “I’d love to help, but I can’t commit to this right now.” 4️⃣ Build Emotional Vocabulary: Swap “I’m fine” for specifics: “I feel frustrated because my time wasn’t respected.” This clarity shifts how people respond to you. 5️⃣ Set a Boundary & Stick to It: If you check emails at all hours, set a cutoff time and communicate it: “I respond to emails between 8 AM-6 PM. I’ll get back to you then!” Real Results, Real Leaders A CFO I worked with used these steps and cut unnecessary meetings by 40%, improving focus and team morale. Another executive reduced conflict by implementing a simple pause before responding. Your Turn: Start Today Which of these steps will you implement first? Comment below or share your biggest challenge with boundaries and emotional intelligence! Let’s build better leadership—one self-aware decision at a time. ♻️ I hope you found this valuable, please share with your network. 📌As a seasoned finance and operations leader with years of experience, I am passionate about organizational leadership and developing future leaders. I am currently seeking my next opportunity and welcome connections to discuss how my expertise can add value to your organization. Click "Follow" and 🔔 #Leadership #SelfAwareness #EmotionalIntelligence #Coaching #PersonalGrowth #MindsetMatters #LeadershipDevelopment #SuccessMindset #HighPerformance #BusinessLeadership #LeadWithPurpose #ExecutiveCoaching #ProfessionalGrowth #BetterDecisions

Do you think emotional intelligence can be taught, or is it something you’re born with? If you (or someone you know) struggles with EQ, the good news is—it can be trained (like any other skill) Here’s a neuroscience-backed framework to develop EQ: 1️⃣ Develop Self-Awareness: The Foundation of Emotional Intelligence 95% of leaders THINK they are self-aware, but only 10-15% ACTUALLY are. Without self-awareness, leaders misjudge their impact on others, leading to friction, low engagement, and team disengagement. ✅ Ask for feedback (and actually listen). Use 360-degree feedback tools to understand how your leadership style affects others. ✅ Practice mindfulness & reflection. Neuroscience shows that 10 minutes of daily mindfulness rewires the brain to be more aware of emotions. ✅ Keep an EQ journal. Track emotional triggers and reactions. Identify patterns in how you respond to stress, conflict, or feedback. Satya Nadella (Microsoft CEO) transformed Microsoft’s culture by prioritizing self-awareness and empathy—shifting from a “know-it-all” culture to a “learn-it-all” culture. The result? Microsoft’s valuation quadrupled. 2️⃣ Master Emotional Regulation: Stay in Control Under Pressure Leaders under stress react instead of respond. The amygdala (fear center of the brain) hijacks logical thinking, leading to defensive reactions, impulsive decisions, and poor leadership moments. ✅ Use the “Name It to Tame It” Technique. Neuroscience shows that simply labeling an emotion (e.g., “I’m feeling frustrated”) reduces its intensity by 50%. ✅ Practice “Cognitive Reframing.” Train your brain to reframe stress as an opportunity instead of a threat. ✅ Breathing hacks: Slow, deep breathing reduces cortisol (stress hormone), keeping the brain in an optimal leadership state. 3️⃣ Build Empathetic Communication: The Secret to Influence & Trust Many high-IQ leaders struggle with empathy because they focus on logic rather than emotional cues. Poor empathy leads to low engagement, high turnover, and poor collaboration. ✅ Develop active listening skills. Neuroscience shows that leaders who repeat back what someone says (paraphrasing) create stronger neural connections of trust. ✅ Use mirror neurons to build connection. Maintaining eye contact, nodding, and mirroring speech patterns activates the brain’s trust circuitry. ✅ Practice perspective-taking. Before making a decision, ask: “How would I feel if I were in their shoes?” Indra Nooyi (former PepsiCo CEO) wrote personal letters to employees’ parents, acknowledging their contributions. This small act of empathetic leadership built extraordinary loyalty and engagement. Takeaway: Adapt or Become Obsolete Some of the smartest, most accomplished executives fail spectacularly when it comes to emotional intelligence. Because IQ ≠ EQ. The future of leadership isn’t about IQ—it’s about EQ. #Leadership #EmotionalIntelligence #ExecutiveCoaching #Neuroscience #FutureOfWork #CLevelLeadership

The first time I saw this image I was a 30-year-old in my therapist's office. She asked me how I was feeling about a complicated issue. After several seconds of silence and a blank stare, she slid these words toward me. It was like a whole new language opened up for me to make sense of what was happening internally. Over a decade later, it is one of my most frequently used leadership and confidence-building coaching tools- yes, an emotions wheel. Some of my clients love it and have it hanging in their office. Some of them pause knowing it's time to get a little vulnerable. Many of them refer to it as the "emotional cheese wheel." (& Why do I make it such a common practice to stop and name your emotions? Somewhere along the line, we were taught to set our emotions aside in favor of data, logic or a "plan." Maybe we learned that feeling emotions means we are being dramatic. But in my experience, and research shows, the more we are able to accurately label our emotions, the more *in control* we feel. Emotions are data that give us clues as to what matters to us and what we care about. When we get granular about what emotions we are feeling below a broad label like "anxiety," we are able to identify WHY we are feeling them. For example, a client realized that by naming her emotions, she became clear on: ▫️ Anger: A boundary had been crossed and she needed to communicate that ▫️ Frustration: A courageous performance conversation needed to be had ▫️ Worry: Her delegation tactics needed tweaking so correct action would be taken ▫️ Inadequacy: Self-compassion would be helpful as she is back in "new role learning mode" Claiming and naming her emotions didn't give them power, it helped her reclaim confidence and power by creating internal clarity. Successful leaders are self-aware leaders. Have you used an emotions wheel and has it helped you? #womenleaders #confidence #careers #leadershipdevelopment