Coaching Techniques for Conflict Resolution

Conflict gets a bad rap in the workplace. Early in my career, I believed conflict had no place in a healthy workplace. As I progressed, I realized that it was quite the contrary. The lack of conflict isn't a sign of a healthy work culture, rather it is an indication that important debates, discussions and differing viewpoints are being disregarded or suppressed. This insight revealed another key aspect: high-performing teams do not shy away from conflict. They embrace it, leveraging diverse opinions to drive optimal outcomes for customers. What sets these teams apart is their ability to handle conflict constructively. So how can this be achieved? I reached out to my friend Andrea Stone, Leadership Coach and Founder of Stone Leadership, for some tips on effectively managing conflict in the workplace. Here's the valuable guidance she provided: 1. Pause: Take a moment to assess your feelings in the heat of the moment. Be curious about your emotions, resist immediate reactions, and take the time to understand the why behind your feelings. 2. Seek the Other Perspective: Engage genuinely, listen intently, show real interest, and ask pertinent questions. Remember to leave your preconceived judgments at the door. 3. Acknowledge Their Perspective: Express your understanding of their viewpoint. If their arguments have altered your perspective, don't hesitate to share this with them. 4. Express Your Viewpoint: If your opinion remains unswayed, seek permission to explain your perspective and experiences. Remember to speak from your viewpoint using "I" statements. 5. Discuss the Bigger Objective: Identify common grounds and goals. Understand that each person might have a different, bigger picture in mind. This process can be taxing, so prepare beforehand. In prolonged conflict situations, don't hesitate to suggest breaks to refresh and refuel mentally, physically, and emotionally. 6. Know Your Limits: If the issue is of significant importance to you, be aware of your boundaries. For those familiar with negotiation tactics, know your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement). 7. Finalize Agreements: Once an agreement has been reached, continue the engagement to agree on responsibilities and timeframes. This ensures clarity on the outcome and commitments made. PS: Approach such situations with curiosity and assume others are trying to do the right thing. 🔁 Useful? I would appreciate a repost. Image Credit: Hari Haralambiev ----- Follow me, tap the (🔔) Omar Halabieh for daily Leadership and Career posts.

As a top leader, every time you hear a complaint, it’s easy to get caught up in distractions and drama. Avoiding the complaint doesn’t make the problem go away. Listening endlessly to the problem only grows new neuro-connections for the purpose of venting. Persecuting and shaming the complainer doesn’t build collaborative relationships. Fixing the problem creates codependency. What can you do instead? You reinterpret, acknowledge, and ask a question. Here's how... Reinterpret the complaint as a hidden or unmet need. (When you change your interpretation from judgment and dread, to believing you’ve uncovered an unmet need, you gain more capacity to manage the conflict.) Acknowledge the complaint. Say something like, “I hear you. You’re upset because…” Once they feel heard, the next step is to ask a question. This question is key to guiding the conversation. The question is, “What do you want?” Then pause. Chances are, they won’t know. They’ll try to distract you with what’s not fair, what didn’t happen, why what they want won’t work, and so on. Stay the course. The real question to ask and be answered is “What do you want?” Beware of the trap, “What I want is for Kim to be fired,” or “What I want is to win the lottery.” These answers are an indication of lazy thinking and victim mentality. If they say, “I don’t know,” your next step is to say, “think about it and get back with me. I can only support you once you articulate what you want.” The value of this process is that it also works in your personal life and with yourself. How it works for yourself: The next time you find yourself complaining recognize that you’re wasting time. Search for and articulate your unmet need. The question this time is “What do I want?” Try that and let me know what happens! #leadership #Communication #Coaching

Let's talk about something we all experience but don't always know how to handle: Conflict in the Workplace. I've been there, knee-deep in disagreements, and let me tell you, it's not a walk in the park. But through the years, I've picked up some strategies that have really helped, not just for me but also in developing other leaders in the organization. 1. Active Listening: The first thing is to truly understand what the other person is saying. This goes beyond nodding while planning your next counter-argument. It's about gaining a full understanding of the issue at hand. 2. Open Dialogue: Transparency is key. Creating an environment where everyone feels comfortable speaking their minds can nip a lot of issues in the bud. 3. Role-Playing: I get it, it can feel awkward. But practicing these scenarios can help you get better at handling real conflicts when they come up. 4. Teach Empathy: When leaders are trained to put themselves in the shoes of others, conflicts can often be avoided or more easily resolved. 5. Neutral Mediation: Sometimes you're just too close to the problem. That's where a neutral third party comes in, to give an unbiased perspective. 6. Self-Reflection: After any conflict, it's good practice to think about what you could have done differently. It's all part of the learning process. 7. Case Studies: Look at how other organizations have handled conflict. Trust me, you're not reinventing the wheel here... you can learn a lot from others experiences. 8. Outcome Focused: Remember what the end goal is. If everyone wants the same thing, figuring out how to get there is half the battle. 9. Regular Check-Ins: Keeping the lines of communication open can help you detect problems before they blow up into full-fledged conflicts. 10. Feedback Loops: After resolving an issue, it's helpful to revisit and evaluate what went well and what didn't. Continuous improvement is the name of the game. "The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall" - Nelson Mandela Have a Safe, Positive & Productive Monday! #LeadershipDevelopment #ConflictResolution #TeamBuilding #EmotionalIntelligence #ContinuousImprovement

Here’s a simple tool that’s changed my life and the lives of many of my clients: It’s called Non Violent Communication (NVC) NVC is a way of resolving conflict with mutually satisfying solutions. It’s great for business leaders since hard conversations are par for the course. But it’s also great for personal relationships as well. Here’s the simple 3-step strategy to NVC: 1 - The Fact Begin with an indisputable observation. For example: “When you said you didn’t want to go on a trip with me…” You want to describe the situation in a purely objective way that no one can argue with. 2 - Your Feelings Next, share how you felt. “When ___ happened, I felt ___.” This invites your conversation partner into a dialogue about how the situation impacted you. It demonstrates that you’re opening up, being vulnerable, and not arguing for the sake of ‘winning’. 3 - The Request: Conclude with a request that would resolve your unmet need. “My request is that you are on time for our meetings going forward.” Framing this as a request and not a demand makes the conversation a cooperative one. That’s it! It’s an incredibly simple foundation that takes a lot of time and effort to master, especially in the heat of an argument. Give it a shot — practice makes perfect.