Setting boundaries as a female designer

As a designer, I didn't have healthy boundaries early in my career, but building a business and a team of 40+ taught me how to fix this. It's a universal truth:  The most successful leaders don't do everything. They protect their energy for what matters most.  Most people need to set boundaries but don't know how. For starters: - Your time is your most valuable leadership asset - Saying yes to everything means saying no to work - Setting boundaries increases others' respect for you These are the exact phrases that work for me in different scenarios: 1. When emails/texts flood my inbox after work, I say: > Thanks. I'll get back to you during business hours tomorrow. 2. I see "ASAP" being overused for designers a lot, so I learned this: What's your expected deadline? I'll need it to know if I can make it work. 3. When my interior design projects expand endlessly: > This is beyond the original scope. We need to review the timeline and resources. But words alone aren't going to build your boundaries.  This mindset shift makes them stick forever: > You're not being difficult.  You're being a more effective leader. When you protect your time and energy, you show up more focused and make better decisions. So what you can do that works is simple: - Choose one phrase to practice this week - Rehearse it beforehand if it is new for you - Deliver it with confidence, not an apology - Build your boundary vocabulary over time Remember this for the next time and whenever you need to protect your time and energy. What's the hardest boundary for you to set at work? #boundaries #leadership #productivity #burnout

I used to suck at setting boundaries. And admittedly, I still find it challenging sometimes. But I’ve gotten better at it and today, I wanted to share a few hacks that have helped me. But let’s pause for a minute. In our society, so much of our value as women is equated with how much we give to others and how much we continue to sacrifice: ❌ self-care (because of course that’s selfish) ❌ unpaid caregiving (“but you love being a mom!”) ❌ unpaid time investments (“can I pick your brain [and benefit from your expertise] for free?”) ❌ unpaid speaking gigs (“but you are so passionate about this topic”) And when we attempt to set boundaries and ask for what we deserve, we are often met with either disbelief or hostility. Classic weaponization of women’s altruism. Or how my Internet friend, the amazing Erin Gallagher puts it: as women we often pay the passion tax. I’m fortunate that I’ve been able to establish a personal brand that’s constantly attracting opportunities. I could be a full-time networker or advisor. Unfortunately, that’s not possible. I have bills to pay. And I’m busy building generational wealth. I can’t say yes to everyone who’s asking me to have a (virtual) coffee chat. Or pick my brain. 🧠 Money talks. Yes, “No.” is a full sentence. But you’re still dealing with real people, with real feelings on the other side. And a lot of societal conditioning that still makes many women - including myself - feel like we don’t want to come across as too assertive or rude. Here are two phrases I’ve started incorporating into my life: 1️⃣ “Thank you for reaching out. I’m currently not adding to my calendar until [February/the new year/next quarter].” Inspired by ✨ Lolita Taub whom I’ve been trying to get on my podcast twice now but always seem to catch at a bad time. I applaud her for setting boundaries. 👏 2️⃣ “This is a season where I have to choose between [self-care/wrapping up high-priority projects/family] and amazing opportunities like yours, and I have to protect my yeses for my loved ones.” Inspired by Jenna Kutcher who has built a multi-million dollar business while fiercely protecting her family time. Whenever I hit “send” on these types of messages, I still feel a little uncomfortable. But recently, I’ve started receiving more and more messages (from women) telling me they respect a woman who’s setting boundaries for herself. I think most women crave boundaries. But they’re scared of being ostracized. So I challenge YOU: Whenever you reach out to a woman next and she’s either asking to be paid (fairly) or declining an invitation, before you start forming an unfavorable opinion of her, ask yourself if that opinion is actually warranted or a result of your unconscious gender bias. #settingboundaries #genderbias #genderequality #womenatwork #womensupportingwomen #femaleeconomy

Setting clear boundaries as a woman in the workplace, especially for the first time, can be terrifying. But it’s the key to making sure we balance work and family - and it helps us advocate for collective needs. When I was navigating my leadership role as a working mom in ad tech - an industry that often glorifies the always-on hustle culture - I often struggled with making time for my family while still delivering exceptional work. What worked for me wasn't going it alone. It was finding power in numbers. When I discovered that I wasn't the only one feeling this tension between my job and my family, I started connecting with other women facing similar challenges, and we created a micro-community of support that grew our confidence in boundary-setting. Together, we developed two approaches that made all the difference: First, boundary-setting became a shared practice. When one of us modeled setting healthy limits - leaving for school pickups, blocking calendar time for family dinner - it created permission for other people on our team to do the same. Second, we reframed individual needs as collective business improvements. Instead of "I need a nursing room," we presented "The company needs a wellness space that supports working parents, which will improve retention and recruitment." The leadership team responded far better to collective advocacy than individual requests. They could see these weren't just personal preferences - they were business necessities that would benefit the entire organization. Setting boundaries helped me find community and support others in pursuing a better work-life balance. And it helped me realize that when we advocate together, we don't just change our own lives - we make work a better place for everyone who follows.