Networking Tips for Landing a Great Mentor

Here's my "Never ask for a mentor" framework that led to: - Mentorship from an NYC food entrepreneur - Writing for Ryan Holiday - My first 6-figure job - $2k to speak with zero experience - Getting on top business podcasts (before I had a business) - Moving from teaching to tech - Quitting my job and going solo I know this is going to help people: 1. Never use the "M" word - Never ever ever ever (ever) ask someone to be your "mentor" - This creates instant pressure - Start with a specific, thoughtful question about their work - Show you've done your homework on their background - Ask one simple question that will help you (that they can answer is less than 60 seconds) - Be SPECIFIC (Not "whats your best tip for somebody starting out..") - Keep initial outreach brief and respectful of their time 2. Take their advice and ACTUALLY DO IT - This is where 99% of people fail - When someone gives you advice, implement it immediately - Don't wait for perfect conditions - just execute - Document your process and results 3. Circle back with results - Return with "I tried what you suggested and here's what happened..." - Be honest about both successes and failures - Express genuine gratitude for their guidance - Nobody does this - they'll be genuinely surprised 4. Use that momentum to ask the next question - This creates natural permission to continue the conversation - Each exchange builds more trust and access - Focus on quality questions that show you're serious - Create a cycle of value exchange rather than a one-sided relationship 5. Repeat consistently - Continue this loop with multiple people in your industry - Be patient - relationships build over time - Gradually deepen connections through consistent follow-through That's basically it. People love seeing their advice put into action. While everyone else is asking for mentorship and doing nothing with it, you'll stand out by simply following through. Do this enough times and you'll build a network that creates true freedom - freedom where you will always have work if/when you want it and a support network that lasts a lifetime. Any questions? Was this helpful?

I get a lot of messages from folks looking for support and guidance, whether it’s about growing a speaking career, advancing in a role, or starting a business. I've reached to folks too and been turned down or ignored plenty of times. In hindsight it's probably because I didn't follow these guidelines: 1️⃣ Be specific. Instead of “Can I pick your brain?” try something like, “I’m working on breaking into this industry and could use some advice on this specific challenge…” or “I’d love tips on structuring my keynote.” The clearer you are, the easier it is to help. 2️⃣ Be flexible. Someone recently told me, "I’ll meet you anywhere, anytime within 10 minutes of your house…”—and that kind of openness caught my attention. Remember, when you’re asking for someone’s time without cost, being flexible (and eager) goes a long way. 3️⃣ Be kind. It sounds simple, but a warm, genuine acknowledgment of someone’s time and expertise can mean a lot. Something like: "Hi [Name], I’ve been following you on LinkedIn, and your recent post about [topic] really resonated with me. I admire how you handle tough conversations. I’m facing a challenge at work and would love your thoughts. I promise to keep it under 10 minutes. I know this is a favor, so I’ll be as flexible as I can." 🌟 See how these three steps work? It’s about being specific, flexible, and appreciative. It makes it easier for the other person to say yes. 💡 Bonus tip: You don’t have to worry about offering something in return. Just be upfront about asking for a favor and express genuine gratitude. If this approach speaks to you, I hope it helps make your future networking asks a little easier!

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐓𝐨 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦 Finding good mentors is the practice of patience, diligence, and persistence. Like any relationship, the dialog with someone who could be a mentor begins with a simple question. Will you be willing to speak with me? It could be advice on your technical path, your career journey or to gain knowledge from the other person’s experiences. Reaching out to individuals of interest on forums like LinkedIn can be helpful but keep in mind that many of those individuals are busy or they might not be the right fit. Having a broad approach is critical. 𝐏𝐫𝐨-𝐭𝐢𝐩: Individuals who are already known to be highly active mentors are probably not your target audience as they are usually already quite busy.   Try to establish some point of mutual interest but make it reasonably relevant. Being born in the same town, going to the same university or both of you following Man United might not cut it. Be more creative. If successful in gaining a meeting, use that first session to introduce yourself, the purpose of why you reached out to them (if this is unclear from prior communication) and learn about themselves. Use some social savvy as to how the first conversation goes. If the two of you seem to ‘click,’ ask for a follow-up meeting perhaps 1-3 months down the line (remember what I said about patience). If the person is interested, they will agree, and you can continue the dialog. Over time, if further meetings occur, begin to refine the topics, perhaps even notifying the individual in advance of those points so they can reflect in advance. Show that you have reflected on previous discussions and come prepared with your thoughts. Obviously if the person does not agree to a second meeting, they are not feeling mutual interest or may not have the time. Respect that and move on. Ultimately these dialogs turn into mentoring relationships if both parties are gaining something from the conversations and you are showing respect for the other person’s time. Asking an individual in these situations to be your mentor is somewhat of a formality. Some of my best mentors never said and I never asked. I just appreciated their time and learned. Keep in mind that potential mentors or even those early contacts are not there to offer job referrals or recommendations, or help you get a job in the initial stages of interaction. I see this mistake made repeatedly by individuals. It derails a potentially rewarding mentoring relationship by turning it into a transactional process of helping them before a basis for that assistance can even occur. Don’t be that person. It doesn’t work and it reflects badly on you. Over time they may choose to do so but it will be at their initiative in most cases. If the relationship is solid, the ask is far easier and usually granted proactively. Try some different approaches to find what works best for you. Good luck! #mentoring #opportunity #career