How to Make a Positive Impression on a Mentor

Here’s a secret to help you supercharge your networking. Stop trying to hit home runs with every touch point. Instead, focus on small wins that move the conversation forward. I see so many people making big / vague asks up front: “Can you hop on a 30 minute call?” “Tell me how you accomplished [Big Thing].” These people are super busy and they’re receiving this email from you - a total stranger. The last thing they want is another item on their to do list. Instead, start with a small, simple ask that they can reply to in <30 seconds. Here’s a formula that's been really effective for me: “Hey [Name], your experience in [Industry] is really impressive. I know you're busy, but I just had to ask: If you had to start over and work your way back to [Insert Achievement], would you do A or B? A: [Insert Actionable Thing] B: [Insert Other Actionable Thing]” This formula makes is incredibly easy for them to say "I'd do A" or "I'd do B." Now the door is open! Go do thing A or thing B, get results, and report back. Let this person know you took their advice and then ask for more. This positions you as someone who values their advice and has an action bias -- someone worth investing in. That's going to lead to deeper conversations and stronger relationships!

Here's my "Never ask for a mentor" framework that led to: - Mentorship from an NYC food entrepreneur - Writing for Ryan Holiday - My first 6-figure job - $2k to speak with zero experience - Getting on top business podcasts (before I had a business) - Moving from teaching to tech - Quitting my job and going solo I know this is going to help people: 1. Never use the "M" word - Never ever ever ever (ever) ask someone to be your "mentor" - This creates instant pressure - Start with a specific, thoughtful question about their work - Show you've done your homework on their background - Ask one simple question that will help you (that they can answer is less than 60 seconds) - Be SPECIFIC (Not "whats your best tip for somebody starting out..") - Keep initial outreach brief and respectful of their time 2. Take their advice and ACTUALLY DO IT - This is where 99% of people fail - When someone gives you advice, implement it immediately - Don't wait for perfect conditions - just execute - Document your process and results 3. Circle back with results - Return with "I tried what you suggested and here's what happened..." - Be honest about both successes and failures - Express genuine gratitude for their guidance - Nobody does this - they'll be genuinely surprised 4. Use that momentum to ask the next question - This creates natural permission to continue the conversation - Each exchange builds more trust and access - Focus on quality questions that show you're serious - Create a cycle of value exchange rather than a one-sided relationship 5. Repeat consistently - Continue this loop with multiple people in your industry - Be patient - relationships build over time - Gradually deepen connections through consistent follow-through That's basically it. People love seeing their advice put into action. While everyone else is asking for mentorship and doing nothing with it, you'll stand out by simply following through. Do this enough times and you'll build a network that creates true freedom - freedom where you will always have work if/when you want it and a support network that lasts a lifetime. Any questions? Was this helpful?

Tired of sending "tell me about your job" DMs? Here's how to make mentorship requests stand out! I get DMs every week from folks interested in my path to being a software engineer. Most start with, "Hi, I see you work at [company] – what's the culture like? How'd you get in?" While I want to help, these generic questions are tough to answer meaningfully. What works so much better is showing initiative and tailoring your questions. Here's my recommended approach: 1. Introduce yourself with impact. "Hi [Name], I'm [Your Name] with a background in [area of expertise]. I'm currently building [project] using [technologies]." 2. Ask targeted questions. Replace vague inquiries with: "I loved your blog post on [topic]. Could you elaborate on [specific idea]?" "How do you balance [skill] with [skill] – an area I'm working to improve?" "Your work on [project] is impressive. How did you approach [challenge]?" Why this works: Tailored feedback: Specific questions get you answers that directly help you grow. Skill practice: Articulating your background and goals upfront is like a mini-interview prep. Give before you get: Demonstrate your interest and work ethic, making experts more invested in your success. Instead of asking "what's your job like," show who you are and ask for targeted help. You'll stand out and get the insights that truly matter. Let me know what you think in the comments! #mentorship #softwareengineering #careergrowth #networking

I do a lot of networking with folks looking for advice and trying to figure out their careers. Here are the top things I wish folks would do when engaging with me: 1. Do your homework in advance. If your ask could've been done without talking to me, it should've been done beforehand. A LOT of people ask me for help with finding a job at NVIDIA yet they have not identified any specific role at NVIDIA relevant to them. You can browse NVIDIA's open roles before talking to me. If you haven't at least taken this step, I don't see value in giving you my time. 2. Make it easy for me. If I give you my time to meet, send me a calendar invite ASAP (surprisingly a lot of people don't do this). Be flexible with your schedule when scheduling with me. If there are wide swaths of time during which you can't meet with me, meeting with me is probably not that important to you. If it's not important to you, then why should it be important to me? 3. Do the work. Be specific. Go deep. If you have an ask, make sure you've put some thought and work into it. There is a decent amount of content about me and my company online. Understanding this and looking into it beforehand helps you and I get the most leverage out of our interactions. 4. What's in it for me? Good interactions are 2 way exchanges. People who very one-sidedly ask me for anything clearly do not understand this. A lot of the great mentors I had understood that I had a perspective into a world they weren't plugged into. They would ask and I would volunteer whatever insights were relevant to them. This made it worth their time. 5. Build relationships, not LinkedIn connections. Adding somebody on LinkedIn is easy. Therefore, it isn't differentiated and is thus low value. Sending somebody a LinkedIn connection request with a message is still easy, but it's actually much harder than without a message. And because of that, it's actually differentiated. But building a legitimate and genuine relationship with someone is truly different and challenging. And because of that, it's more likely to get a desirable outcome. The bulk of great relationship building does not happen on LinkedIn. LinkedIn is a tool, not a destination. Understand this and know how to use it. 6. Know when to reach out. The absolute worst time to engage with me is after I have a LinkedIn post that gets a lot of traction. That's when everyone is reaching out to me. And given the volume, I am least likely to engage with someone whom I don't already know. The patient person realizes this. And remembers to engage me once things have settled down. This takes more effort, which is why it's so rare. These are just a few of my observations and advice for folks trying to network in general and on LinkedIn. It's doable, but it takes effort to do something different and unique. The more thoughtful you are and the more effort you put in, the more likely you are to become an Ace networker!

How often has a stranger or a friend of a friend reached out to you for a “quick chat” but they ask aimless questions, have done no research on their own, or just want you to give your valuable knowledge away for free? A friend of a friend asked me to help his relatively junior business development manager prepare for a pitch to an investor who had already seen part of their pitch and stopped in the middle telling them to come back when they were more prepared. I listened to the pitch and realized it needed a lot of work and more than I could help with in two days. So I told her I would meet with her again only if she watched/read some resources I sent her on verbal and nonverbal communication, presence, and speaking more concisely. She did and I was blown away at her second attempt the next day. Her pre-work made helping her so much easier. The investor was apparently pleased too because they are now talking numbers. Lessons? ✅ if you’re the one giving the advice, remember your time and expertise are valuable. If you don’t know this person and are doing a favor for someone and don’t want to charge for a consultation, give them an assignment before they meet with you. If they haven’t done their homework, stop the meeting and make sure that the person who referred them to you knows about it. ✅ make the meeting time short so that the conversation stays focused. Remember, you can always make more money. You can’t make more time. ✅ if you’re the one seeking the mentorship or advice, do your research. Go beyond looking at social media or website profiles. Read articles about the person and the topic you plan to discuss. See if they’ve been on podcasts, and find out everything you can about them and their industry. Nothing wastes more time (to me at least) than someone asking “tell me about your journey.” Instead think of targeted questions that directly relate to what you want to know and how this person’s advice can help you. And then ask them if there is anyone you can talk to and whether they are willing to make an introduction. If you were prepared when you spoke to them, the answer will likely be yes. If you wasted their time, they won’t want to risk their reputation by referring you to anyone else. ✅ if you’re the expert, at some point think of when you need to charge for that brainstorming session and be ruthless with your calendar. I spent at least 4 hours with the brainstorming and pitch coaching sessions with that business development novice. They now have an investor and I have the satisfaction of helping them, but I undervalued myself and was out of my integrity with my time. What are your best tips for preserving your time and boundaries when someone wants to “pick your brain for a minute”?