Networking with Mentors

The best mentors won't find you, You have to find them. My core values for career development: • Ownership - Taking responsibility for your growth • Courage - Moving through discomfort for what matters • Reciprocity - Creating value, not just taking it What I can't stand is seeing people wait for career opportunities while mistaking passivity for patience. Here's how to ask potential mentors (without feeling awkward): 1/ Be direct about your goals Don't beat around the bush. Tell them exactly what you need. "I was promoted to senior engineer and want to level up my systems architecture skills. Would you be willing to mentor me?" 2/ Tell them why you chose them People appreciate knowing what drew you to them specifically, showing you’ve done your homework. "I'm reaching out because of your experience leading engineering teams at high-growth startups." 3/ Start with a small ask Don't request a long-term commitment right away. "Would you be open to a 30-minute video call to connect?" 4/ Be gracious if rejected Sometimes people don't have bandwidth. That's okay. "I understand you have significant demands on your time." 5/ Ask for alternatives If they decline, their network might be your next opportunity. "Is there anyone you'd recommend I connect with instead?" 6/ Approach with the right mindset Confidence in your goals. Respect for their time. Gratitude for their expertise. I've seen too many careers stall because of fear of rejection. But I promise: The temporary discomfort of reaching out is nothing compared to the permanent pain of career stagnation. Stop waiting for the perfect mentor to appear. Make the first move today. What strategies have worked for you when finding mentors? Image Credit: GraciousQuotes --- Follow me, tap the (🔔) Omar Halabieh for daily Leadership and Career posts.

Here’s a secret to help you supercharge your networking. Stop trying to hit home runs with every touch point. Instead, focus on small wins that move the conversation forward. I see so many people making big / vague asks up front: “Can you hop on a 30 minute call?” “Tell me how you accomplished [Big Thing].” These people are super busy and they’re receiving this email from you - a total stranger. The last thing they want is another item on their to do list. Instead, start with a small, simple ask that they can reply to in <30 seconds. Here’s a formula that's been really effective for me: “Hey [Name], your experience in [Industry] is really impressive. I know you're busy, but I just had to ask: If you had to start over and work your way back to [Insert Achievement], would you do A or B? A: [Insert Actionable Thing] B: [Insert Other Actionable Thing]” This formula makes is incredibly easy for them to say "I'd do A" or "I'd do B." Now the door is open! Go do thing A or thing B, get results, and report back. Let this person know you took their advice and then ask for more. This positions you as someone who values their advice and has an action bias -- someone worth investing in. That's going to lead to deeper conversations and stronger relationships!

A mentor once gave feedback that kept me up all night. It wasn’t cruel. It wasn’t even wrong. But it hit something deep, and I couldn’t stop replaying it. That’s the thing about harsh criticism: It can hijack your mind even when it’s helpful. Here’s how I’ve learned to process it without spiraling: 1️⃣ Pause before reacting. Let your thinking brain catch up. 2️⃣ Separate tone from truth. Delivery ≠ value. 3️⃣ Drop the identity reflex. It’s about the action, not your worth. 4️⃣ Look for patterns. One comment = opinion. Several = signal. 5️⃣ Use it as a mirror, not a verdict. Reflect before you react. 6️⃣ Know who matters. Not all feedback deserves your energy. 7️⃣ Break the loop. Walk. Breathe. Write. Ground yourself. You don’t need to dissociate from criticism. You need to integrate it skillfully. ♻️ Repost if you’ve ever replayed a comment longer than it deserved. 🔔 Follow Matt Schnuck for insights on EQ, boundaries, and clear communication.

Mentorship has been a cornerstone of my career, but my approach to building a network of mentors has evolved over time. Early on, I thought the best mentors were those who mirrored my role—essentially a more successful, more experienced version of myself. But I’ve since realized that this myopic approach often misses the mark. Some of the most valuable mentors I’ve had weren’t in venture capital at all. They came from adjacent industries like asset management, tackling challenges that are analogous to mine but offering perspectives I couldn’t see from within my own field. Here’s why this works: 1. Outside perspectives reveal blind spots: Mentors outside your industry can identify dynamics in your business that might be invisible to you because you're too close to them. These insights are invaluable for seeing the bigger picture. 2. Diverse thinking adds depth: A broader, more diverse network of mentors exposes you to new ways of solving problems, offering frameworks and strategies you might not encounter within your immediate circle. Building a mentor base is critical, but diversity is key. Don’t just look for people who are “you in 20 years” with more success. Instead, seek mentors with fresh perspectives and different lenses. That’s where the real value lies.

Have you ever felt that immediate internal bristle when someone gives you #feedback? That visceral "but, but, but..." response that bubbles up before you've even fully processed what they've said? I had one of those moments just last week. A client mentioned that my explanation of a leadership framework "went a bit into the weeds". My first thought? "But I was just being thorough!" (Complete with an internal eye roll that would make any teenager proud.) #Defensiveness is such a natural human response. Our brains are literally wired to protect our self-image — it's not a character flaw, it's neurobiology! (Thanks, brain.) But here's what I've learned from years of both giving and receiving difficult feedback: how we handle those defensive moments often determines whether we grow from feedback or just barely survive it. Here's my toolkit for when those defensive walls go up (and they will): 1. Notice the feeling without jumping to action. When your chest tightens or your thoughts race toward justification, just label it: "This is defensiveness showing up." That tiny pause creates space between feeling and reacting. 2. Remember that impact beats intent every time. My intentions for that workshop were excellent (thoroughness!), but if the impact was confusion, that's what matters. My good intentions don't erase someone else's experience. 3. Reframe feedback as a catalyst for improvement and growth. The people who tell us uncomfortable truths are offering us something valuable. Sometimes the feedback that stings most contains the exact insight we need. (I have found that the truer the feedback is, the more it hurts.) 4. Focus on specific behaviors rather than your identity. There's a world of difference between "that explanation was confusing" and "you're a confusing person." Separate the action from your sense of self. 5. Give yourself permission to be imperfect. You're allowed to be a work in progress. (I know that I sure am.) Developing this #mindset transforms defensiveness from a threat to your worth into a normal part of your growth journey. What are your go-to strategies when defensiveness strikes? I'd love to hear what works for you. And yes, I'll shorten my explanation for the next time. Sometimes, the feedback that makes us squirm today often becomes the #wisdom we're grateful for tomorrow. #Professionaldevelopment #leadership #emotionalIntelligence #Feedbackculture

How do you find a mentor? Last week, I wrote about how essential it has been for me to find mentors in the VC space, and how that was also true during my playing career in the NBA. The advice to find one is simple. Doing the actual finding, though, can be a challenge. So, what are some steps that could work? 1️⃣ Who Do You Already Know? That mentor may not already be in your network, but they’re one, two or three calls or emails away from someone who is. Do you know anyone that’s in the field or on the path you’re looking to forge? Do you know someone who might know someone? Did your cousin’s friend’s former boss start their own company, and that’s what you want to do? Is another former student of your favorite history teacher now a software engineer, and you’re interested in that, too? You’ll have to ask around to find that out (I’m not assuming you know much about your cousin’s friend’s old boss). And you’ll have to cast a wide net. And you’ll have to be willing to put yourself out there. I have been lucky enough to find myself in some incredible rooms with impressive people thanks to my career in the NBA. But that wasn’t the end of it. I had to be willing to put myself out there, to share my interests and questions, to encourage them to see me as more than a hooper, in order to create connections. Which leads us to… 2️⃣ Don’t Be Afraid to Ask It’s not always natural or comfortable to ask for help. But, often, that’s the only way you’re going to get it — and get it in the way that you truly need. So, don’t be afraid to ask that person in your network, or who you know just a little, or that you worked with in the past, if they’d be willing to chat. Don’t be afraid to do some research, identify someone that’s on a path that you find drawn to, and reach out by sending a brief note. You might not hear back. A lot of times, honestly, you won’t. But, eventually, you will hear back. You will find someone that’s eager to offer you what they’ve learned along the way. And when you do… 3️⃣ Nurture the Relationship  Once you find that person, remain engaged. Stay curious. Express gratitude. Figure out a cadence of communication that works for both of you. Consider if there’s anything you can offer them — and, trust me, no matter who that person is or where you’re at, there is; it could be as simple as a warm smile or steadily maintaining eye contact as you listen. When I was an OG for some young bucks in the league, I loved it, because it felt like it kept me youthful, and I was able to connect with a newer generation and learn about their passions. 💡 For those of you who have had mentors, what have been the keys to finding them? 💡 💡 For those of you who have been mentors, what’s been an effective way that your mentee has connected with you? 💡 #linkedinsports #mentorship #venturecapital

𝗖𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻'𝘁 𝗯𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗿𝘀. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆'𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗲𝘀. But only if you know how to decode them. I recently had a coaching session that highlighted this perfectly. 𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗱: A client was struggling with her boss. The issue? Cultural miscommunication. The boss was Dutch. My client was from Asia. Two different cultural backgrounds colliding. 𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗱: 1. 𝗖𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 • The boss's communication style was typically Dutch • Direct, which can seem harsh to other cultures 2. 𝗠𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 • My client saw it as personal criticism • In reality, it was cultural norm difference 3. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 • Understanding the cultural context • Adapting communication styles 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘂𝗹𝘁? • Clarity in communication • Improved working relationship • Enhanced job satisfaction Once we put the cultural puzzle pieces in place, everything changed. My client learned to "speak Dutch" professionally. The takeaway? Cultural intelligence isn't just nice to have. It's a critical tool for career success. 𝗪𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘀? Watch my LinkedIn Live: "Build Your Global Leadership Edge: Cultural Intelligence for Team Success" 👉 https://lnkd.in/e3udvtik Learn how to turn cultural challenges into career opportunities. Now, I'm curious: Have you ever had an "aha" moment about cultural differences at work? Share your story in the comments. Let's build our collective cultural intelligence together. 𝗣.𝗦. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗮 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲'𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗱𝘂𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲𝘀. 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗱𝗶𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲 𝗶𝘁? 

This is Probably the WORST Thing You Can Do with Your Mentor: Following Their Lead. Let me explain: Throughout my career, I’ve been fortunate to have incredible mentors who shaped my journey. Each of my mentors have added innumerably to my growth and learning, and I’m endlessly thankful to them. However, I’ve also learned a crucial lesson: you won’t get the best out of your mentor if you're not in charge of your own learning & development. You can have the best mentor by your side but if you're unable to discover yourself, you'll never kearn a thing. Here’s the biggest misconception about mentorship: People believe that a mentor's role is solely to lead. While guidance is essential, the best mentors are those who follow the lead of their mentees. Instead of dropping vague gems of wisdom every once in a while, they take time to understand your aspirations and help you reach new heights. Write it down and never forget: A mentor’s job is not to dictate your path, but collaborate with you on your journey. If you’re lucky enough to find a mentor, here’s are 8 ways in which you can get the most out of that relationship: 1/ Ask Tough Questions: Don’t shy away from challenging discussions. I always appreciated when my mentors provide honest feedback. It helped me refine my vision towards my business. 2/ Paint the Bigger Picture: Help your mentor understand the long-term vision you’re working towards. When they see the bigger picture, they can provide insights that help you with your goals. 3/ Create a Comfortable Space: Provide an environment where your mentor feels comfortable challenging you. Be open to their perspectives, and encourage them to push you beyond your limits. 4/ Be Proactive: Take the initiative in scheduling meetings and setting agendas. Show your mentor that you're committed and ready to take a leap with them. 5/ Set Clear Goals: Clearly outline what you hope to achieve through the mentorship. This helps both you and your mentor stay focused and measure progress. 6/ Act on Feedback: When your mentor provides advice, make sure to implement it and report back on the results. This will help build a relationship of mutual trust with your mentor. 7/ Share Your Wins and Challenges: Keep your mentor updated on your progress, both successes and setbacks. This allows them to offer tailored advice and encouragement, and it fosters a deeper connection. 8/ Network on Their Behalf: Introduce your mentor to your connections or offer to help them in their endeavors. Mentorship can be reciprocal, and showing appreciation through support can strengthen your relationship. Let’s repeat it once again: the Best mentorship is actually collaboration. If you’re ready to invest in your development, you’ll find that the right mentor can open doors and inspire you in ways you never imagined. #Mentorship #Leadership #CareerDevelopment #ProfessionalGrowth #Mentors

Aimless networking won’t get you an interview: If you’re reaching out to people with: ❌ “Hey, are you hiring?” ❌ “Can you refer me for a role?” ❌ “I need a job—can we chat?” Then, you’re doing it wrong. Networking isn’t about ASKING for a job. It’s about BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS that create opportunities. Here’s how to have networking conversations that actually lead to job interviews: 1️⃣ Start with Genuine Interest and Intention of Building the Relationship After some research on the connections, reach out with curiosity, not desperation. Example: “I admire your career path in [industry]. What are some challenges you’re seeing within this space?” 2️⃣ Focus on Their Experience People enjoy sharing their journey. Ask thoughtful questions: ✔ What expertise have you developed in this role? ✔ What are the 2 biggest challenges you’re working on now? ✔ What skills have been most valuable for finding workable solutions? 3️⃣ Share Your Value—Naturally Instead of asking for a job, share what you’ve been working on (or had success in) that is relatable. Example: “I’ve been leading [specific projects] and applying my expertise in [industry]. Sometimes that experience can be a solution to X (one of the challenges they mentioned). 4️⃣ End with a Soft Ask and offer to be a resource for them. Don’t force a referral—invite guidance. Example: “Based on what I’ve shared, who else in your network would be appropriate to be introduced to?” 5️⃣ Follow Up & Stay Visible Keep the relationship alive—send a thank-you note along with a resource for them. Engage with their content, and if you met with a person they referred,  update them on your progress. The best networking is an exchange. It’s strategic and relational. Networking can be challenging if you view it one way.  Make it mutual. Let me know in the comments if you agree that both parties need to benefit from networking conversations and how you prepare to make that happen.

The secret to landing a $200K-500K role? Network like you don’t need one. After coaching 100s of professionals into jobs they love, one thing stands out: The best networkers don’t wait until they  need something. They build relationships year-round. Here’s what they do differently: 1. Target Their Weak Ties ↳ Opportunities often come from people you don’t know very well. 2. Ask for Advice, Not Jobs ↳ Curiosity builds trust faster than a request for help. 3. Lead with Your Value ↳ Start with what you can offer, not what you need. 4. Give Before You Get ↳ Small, thoughtful gestures pay big dividends later. 5. Build When You Don’t Need To ↳ Nurture connections when things are going well. 6. Master the Coffee Chat ↳ Focus on their story. Listen more than you talk. 7. Use the Double Opt-In ↳ Make it effortless for others to introduce you. 8. Stay Top of Mind ↳ Celebrate their wins. Share useful opportunities. 9. Create Your Board of Directors ↳ A small circle of trusted voices guiding your career. 10. Track Everything ↳ Remembering details makes every follow-up easier. Most people only network when they’re desperate. And it shows. Build when you’re content. Stay visible when you’re happy. Give without keeping score. Because the best time to network is right now. Reshare ♻️to help someone in your network. And give me a follow for more posts like this.