Networking in a New City

Hardest part about networking is figuring out how to strike up a conversation with the person you want to talk to without it feeling awkward, contrived, or thirsty. My go-to strategy? Ask good questions. And listen more than you talk. A few ways to go about this… 1. Find commonality. Maybe they went to your alma mater, or you both worked at the same company for a period of time. They may share mutual disdain for a competitor (nothing bonds like hatred), or can relate to some of your experiences. Like sports, people often bond over things they can complain about. 2. Show reverence and curiosity. “Hey, I’m a fan of your work on XYZ, that must have been an incredible project to work on…” 3. Look for an easy in. Grab them a beer if they’re running low. If they’re talking to someone you know, seize the moment to get a friendly introduction but don’t overstay your welcome. 4. Lead with humor. Not stand up comedy, just a quick quip to clear the air: “Love your LinkedIn content! I read it more than my emails.” Just think about how you’d want to be approached. You don't have to come prepared, but you do need to be engaging and authentic. 

How I built my network after moving to NYC (without feeling like a walking LinkedIn request). Relocating to New York can feel like being dropped into a 24/7 networking simulation. But instead of trying to "conquer the city," I focused on integrating into it, with people, places, and conversations that felt real. Here's what worked for me: 🫶 Joined communities that actually fit me I found groups like FIF Collective - spaces where creativity and professional curiosity collide. Being surrounded by people who get it makes all the difference. 📅 Subscribed to local event drops (Luma is a gem) Luma became my go-to spot for niche events and curated meetups. No more doom-scrolling - just solid leads on where to be. 👋 Showed up. 1–3 times a week. Consistency is underrated. I made it a rule to attend 1–3 events a week - no matter how busy things got. It kept the momentum going and led to the best kind of accidental meetings. 📲 Booked coffee chats with locals I didn’t wait to “run into the right people.” I reached out early, introduced myself, and scheduled real conversations. These 1:1s have been where the real value happens. 🎯 Events again! Sought out weirdly specific events Think: private equity meetups, investor circles, or even stuff that might not be trending but definitely attracts the people I wanted to learn from. 🤝 Made intros a habit I’d ask, “Is there one more person you think I should meet?”. 🏛️ Private clubs (Yale, Harvard, etc.) One of the best investments you can make is to join a private club or know someone who can invite you as a guest. These clubs opened doors to new circles, and you can meet people who might not be around in any other events. Did I miss something? Add your recommendations below! #NewYork didn’t hand me a network - I built it, a few conversations at a time. And honestly? That’s what makes it feel like home. If you’re new here or starting fresh somewhere else: go where the people are, follow your curiosity, and don’t underestimate the power of showing up.

"I go to parties, but no one ever approaches me. Is something wrong with me?" A friend asked me this recently. She’s smart. Charming. Totally magnetic. But there was a problem: Her body language was screaming, "DO NOT APPROACH." Here's how to fix approachability (whether you’re networking or just want better social connections): 1. Open Your Torso Always keep your torso angled toward the room, not closed off. We instinctively avoid approaching people with: • Crossed arms • Something clutched to their chest • Bodies turned away from the crowd Opening your body physically and subconsciously signals "I'm open to conversation." ____ 2. Use "Croissant Feet" When standing or talking, position your feet like a croissant—slightly open toward the room. This subtle stance shows you're physically available for others to join your conversation. ____ 3. Stand in the Strategic Spot Most people stand by the entrance, food, or bathroom. Wrong. The sweet spot: Right where people exit the coffee station with drinks in hand. They're ready to mingle, relaxed, and looking to engage. ____ 4. Master the Eyebrow Flash See someone across the room you want to connect with? Give them a subtle eyebrow raise. It's a universal silent “hello” that works across cultures. Note: It's brief - just a quick flash, not a sustained raise. ____ 5. Wear Conversation Starters I wear my Ravenclaw Harry Potter shirt to the gym. People constantly approach me to talk about houses, favorite characters, or share their Hogwarts stories. Other examples: • College alumni gear • Unique accessories (I wear red shoes that always start conversations) • Name tags with something interesting (I write "Recovering Awkward Person" under my name) ____ 6. Treat Strangers Like Old Friends The energy you bring to an old friend is warm and welcoming. With strangers, we get reserved and boring. Instead of: "Nice to meet you. What do you do?" Try: "Oh, it's so great to meet you! What’s been the highlight of your week?" ____ 7. Be "Smile Ready" (Not Fake Smiley) Don't walk around with a permanent grin - that's weird. Instead, be ready with an authentic smile when something genuinely excites you. Real smiles reach your upper cheek muscles. Save them for moments like "Oh, you got a new puppy? I love dogs! Can I see pictures?" ____ Remember: Approachability isn’t just for extroverts. It’s a skill anyone can practice. Making small adjustments in positioning, posture, and energy can completely transform how others perceive and approach you.

It’s fall, and you know what that means: It’s networking season! Many people shy away from networking events because they can be uncomfortable. I understand that - it's normal to feel out of place when you don’t know anyone. But what if you had a strategy to turn every event into a meaningful opportunity? Let me share two simple but effective strategies I use to feel more comfortable and maximize my time at large gatherings: My first tip? Always have a question ready. When you’re at a networking event, people will react positively when you approach them. Everyone’s there to network, right? You can go up to someone and ask something easy like, “What are you most excited about right now?” or “Tell me about you.” These questions open the door to deeper conversations that  take you beyond small talk. When they answer you can pick out something to hook onto to bring the conversation to a deeper level. . The second tip? Have a follow-up plan. As you talk, think about ways you can contribute to the person’s life—a relevant article, podcast, or even a LinkedIn connection. By offering something valuable, you create a natural follow-up that helps maintain the relationship. These strategies help you get value from the event. Networking isn’t just about adding more contacts—it’s about building connections that matter. It’s the difference between feeling like you’re just passing out business cards and walking away with relationships that last. Networking events may be contrived, but with practice they can help you achieve your goals. What’s your go-to strategy for making meaningful connections at networking events? #networking  #strategy  #communication

I hate to break it to you all, but I’m a fraud…. I am not the extrovert that everyone assumes I am. In fact, the first picture you see is me hiding in the bathroom mentally preparing for a networking event. For those who don’t know, a couple weeks ago it was CBC week. Essentially this means everyone and their mother came to DC. Everyday there were a multitude of events from networking and mixers, to late night parties. Despite what y’all see on here, I am not the most outward person (a faćade I know) To be honest, I normally get anxious when networking. I feel awkward randomly walking up to someone I don’t know and trying to start a conversation. I’m scared it’ll feel forced or I’ll seem too overbearing. However, as a young professional, I’ve made a pact to myself to do things that put me outside of my comfort zone and going to networking events alone is one of them. As daunting as it may seem, once you have a strategy for networking, things seem to work out just fine. So here are some things I do to prepare for networking events: 1️⃣ Review event attendees Most events posted on platforms like Eventbrite and LinkedIn will display who is attending the event. I always try to make it a priority to look into the attendees at least once before the event. As I do this, I note who aligns with my interests or work to remind myself to connect with them at the event. 2️⃣ Make a list of common questions to ask If there’s one thing people like to talk about, it’s themselves. Due to that, I have a running list of questions to ask individuals who I meet. I try to ask a mix of questions that are both personal and professional. Here are some examples: ✨Tell me a little about what you currently do. Is there anything you would change about your current role or industry? ✨Where are you from originally? How did you experience growing up shape who you are today? (side note, if they’re from the area in which you’re networking in them, you could also ask about their favorite local spots) ✨If you weren’t in your current field or role, what do you think you’d be doing instead? 3️⃣ Set goals I have learned that you do not have to network with the entire room to have had a good experience or make your mark. In fact, I would argue that having a few good conversations outweighs having 50 basic ones. Thus, the goals I set for myself are focused on making genuine connections. I normally set the goal of having at least 3 genuine conversations over the course of a 2 hour networking event. So far, I’ve been hitting the mark! 4️⃣ Monitor my social battery I do not believe in forcing ANYTHING. So when it comes to a point when I’m all talked out, I leave. There is no shame in it. There is no blame in it. I encourage you all to do the same. You do not need to make yourself stay in a place in which you are overwhelmed. — What are some ways you prepare for networking events? #tipswithtaylor #networking #genz

Someone said "You should teach a transition class at events like these" while at the Air & Space Forces Association annual event in DC yesterday I explained that I have done that before...but attendance at these major events typically fell into 2x buckets: 1 - many of the senior leaders attending weren't even thinking about their transition, so they focused on talking with friends, attending events & industry engagement 2 - the ones in their transition window were hell-bent focused on "finding a job" by going to pitch themselves to every major defense contractor in attendance #quinnsights Going to these booths and saying "I'm the ...." doesn't tell them anything about what you want or can do Companies don't come to these major events to hire (they come to sell and form partnerships) And that events like these (AFA & AUSA) don't typically "get you a job" They give you an entry point (someone to speak to & maybe build a relationship) #militarytransition But the key to every event is FOLLOW UP What should you do? 1 - connect with them on LinkedIn every time Show them your QR code right there and wait for their connection request to come through (sneaky way to ensure they do) 2 - Go into My Network each night and look at your newest connections They are organized chronologically, so they will all be people from the event 3 - Send them a quick note on LinkedIn saying how great it was to meet them at (insert event name) and that you would love to stay in touch for advice This locks in that you met face-to-face in their Inbox...always leaving a reminder there in case either side reaches out (not a cold pitch) 4 - Make a networking spreadsheet that tracks the people you met AND who responded For the ones that responded, asked some simple questions or for a short advice phone call, if appropriate For the ones that didn't - send an additional follow up message one week later to thank them again and add a short easy question (they'll be back from the event & likely have more time) #militarytransition Once you get to the calls, ask questions to learn and listen more than talk to find your success Questions? Is there anything you would add? And will I see you at the AUSA Fireside Chat/Transition Panel on Tuesday Oct 15 from 1300-1500 in Rm 147A/B in the Washington Convention Center?

How to Build a Network from Scratch in NYC 🗽 Starting from zero in a city as dynamic as New York can be intimidating, but the opportunities here are endless. Here’s how you can actively build a powerful network, even if you’re just getting started: 1. Expand Beyond Your Borough: NYC is a melting pot of talent and opportunity. Attend events in different boroughs to meet diverse professionals who can broaden your perspective. Pick an event outside your borough this week and go! 2. Celebrate and Connect: Building a network isn’t just about professional exchanges—it’s about relationships. Send a heartfelt message or call to someone in your network today, whether it's for their birthday, a recent achievement, or just to check in. 3. Invite a Connection to an Event: Networking is more powerful when shared. Invite someone in your network to join you at an upcoming event, like Women Who Network NYC: Creating Connections & Building Community by Miss EmpowHer. Attending together can strengthen your relationship and create new connections. 4. Show Up as Your Authentic Self: In a city full of personalities, authenticity is your superpower. At your next event, share something genuine about your journey—it’s a great conversation starter. 5. Be a Connector, Not Just a Collector: NYC thrives on hustle, but generosity is just as powerful. Introduce two people in your network who could benefit from knowing each other. 6. Follow Up With Intent: Connections fade fast in a busy city. After meeting someone new, set a reminder to follow up within 48 hours. A quick coffee or message can solidify that connection. 7. Turn On Post Notifications: Stay in the loop with your top contacts by engaging with their social media content. Turn on notifications for a few key people in your network and leave meaningful comments on their posts to stay top of mind. 8. Attend High-Impact Events: Not all networking events are created equal. Be selective—choose events that align with your goals and have the potential to create meaningful connections. 9. Pay It Forward: NYC is a city of hustlers, but it’s also a place where generosity is valued. Share a valuable resource or make a meaningful introduction today. The more you give, the more you’ll receive. Ready to put these steps into action? Don’t miss this chance to level up your NYC network! Join us at Women Who Network NYC: Creating Connections & Building Community by Miss EmpowHer – an exclusive event designed for ambitious professionals, entrepreneurs, and creatives. This isn’t just another networking event—it’s your opportunity to connect with inspiring women who are serious about growth and collaboration. Plus, it’s a perfect chance to invite someone from your network to join you and grow together! Register now and invite a friend to secure your spots: https://lu.ma/qag04156 Tag or share this post with someone in your network that needs to attend this event

The best piece of advice I was given about networking: Don't give people your resume. Do this instead! When I was 38, a former colleague gave me an unforgettable piece of advice. I was starting to look for a new job after being laid off. I'd been running myself ragged trying to meet people who could help me. But, like most beginners, I was making a lot of mistakes: • Applying online for jobs and never hearing back • Going to useless networking events, and • Cold calling the wrong people, Until one day, my colleague said to me: "𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙖 𝙏𝙖𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝘾𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙇𝙞𝙨𝙩." That day, my whole approach to networking changed. A Target Company List (TCL) is a list of companies you are interested in learning more about. These are companies where you might want to work. It’s: • A physical, formal list. It doesn’t live “in your head” • Formatted like a resume. You could hand it to someone. • Not laminated. You can make adds and changes to it as you get feedback You create this list by thinking of the type of companies where you want to work. Ask yourself: • Which industry do I want to be in? • What size company do I want to work at? • Which companies have values that align with mine? • Which companies have job postings I’ve applied to? • Which companies are on “Best Places To Work For” lists? Once you create your professionally formatted list, you start giving it to people during networking meetings. Either hand them a physical, paper copy or send it via email. When I got this advice from my colleague, I didn’t understand why the TCL would work, but as I used it over the years, I’ve come to understand why it’s an effective networking tool. When you're in a networking conversation and the other person says, “How can I help you,” most people give them their resume. This makes you hard to help. Who should the person give your resume to? On the other hand, if you give them your TCL and ask, “Do you know anyone who works at one of these companies,” it’s easy for them to say “Yes” or “No.” If they say “Yes,” they can introduce you to the person via email. Now, you know someone at one of your target companies. If they say “No,” you can ask if there are other companies like the ones on the list where they know someone. If they do, you get and introduction at a company you have never considered. If they still don’t know anyone or any companies, let them take the list home. There’s a good chance they’ll think of someone later. The TCL forces you to get specific about how other people can help you. The more specific you are about how someone can help you, the more likely you are to get help. P.S. - This weekend, I'm sharing another tip on Being Easy To Help in 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙄𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙉𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠𝙚𝙧. This is my weekly newsletter where I teach you to be a better networker. Not a subscriber? Sign up for FREE when you hit the link under my headline at the top of the post ☝️

Introvert-friendly networking tip: Start your event connections before the event begins. If walking into a room full of strangers makes your stomach flip, here’s a quiet strategy that can make in-person events feel less intimidating, and more intentional: 💡 Connect on LinkedIn before the event. Look up the event page, RSVP list, or hashtag. Identify a few people, maybe a speaker, a fellow guest, or someone you admire. Then send a short, friendly note like: 👉 “Hi [Name], I saw you’re also attending [Event Name] this week. I’d love to connect here and hopefully say hello in person!” I’ve used this approach myself, attending events alone and still managing to create real conversations, on my terms. Why it works: - You walk in with familiar faces instead of total strangers. - You have a built-in conversation starter (no forced small talk). - You control the pace of connection—before, during, and after the event. 💜 And here’s a bonus: If you don’t get to meet them in person, you still have the connection to follow up later with a kind note or reflection on the event. You don’t have to “work the room” to network well. You just have to be intentional. And that’s where introverts shine. Have we met? 👋 Hi, I’m Ana, a career coach and strategist for introverts. If you are a professional who wants to improve your LinkedIn presence and become visible to recruiters without spending hours job searching, then follow along! #NetworkingTips #introverts

If you struggle to keep conversations going during networking, this tip will increase your response rate. Talk about people’s passions. Why? After getting more than 17,000 followers and networking with hundreds of job searchers, I can confidently say that: People love talking about what excites them. It’s an easy way to build rapport. Here’s how I’ve helped 50+ data professionals leverage this strategy to increase response rates and build meaningful relationships: 1️⃣ Do some research. Look at their LinkedIn or portfolio. Find something impressive. 2️⃣ Start with flattery and curiosity. Example: “Hey [Name], I noticed you [accomplishment/project]. That’s incredible! What’s the part you enjoy most about it?” 3️⃣ Follow their passion. Ask questions to show genuine interest. Let the conversation flow naturally. 4️⃣ Find common ground. When they mention something you relate to, dig deeper. Build the connection. 5️⃣ Tie it back to your goal. Shift the conversation to their role or company. Example: “Oh, does your team work on X?” “How does your company approach Y?” For instance, let’s say their passion is travel. You: “That’s awesome! Where’s the most interesting place you’ve been?” Them: “I loved Thailand!” You: “That’s on my list! Did you manage to work remotely while there?” From there, the conversation naturally moves toward their job. Pro Tip: Not everyone will engage, and that’s okay. You don't have to be "perfect" to start networking. Yes, you will still get rejected, that’s part of the game. But you'll get better after multiple iterations. Focus on connecting with the right people. Try this next time you’re stuck in a conversation and let me know how it went.