Making Meaningful Connections at Tech Meetups

Tired of trying to match an energy level that isn’t you? This might change the way you think about success. We’ve all heard it: “Just speak up more!” or “Be more outgoing!” The real problem? Those well-meaning words push us to ignore our true strengths. The truth is: → Your energy is precious. → Your natural pace is powerful. → Your quiet insights carry weight. Trying to be someone you’re not only stifles what makes you great. So, what if you did this instead? 1️⃣ Highlight your listening superpower When you actually hear people out, you stand out in a sea of surface-level chatter. ✅ Ask questions that matter. ✅ Follow up thoughtfully. 2️⃣ Protect your time & energy Your presence is valuable. Don’t scatter it. ✅ Say “no” if it doesn’t serve you. ✅ Plan moments of solitude before and after busy events. 3️⃣ Speak with purpose Instead of talking for the sake of talking, let your words carry intent. Need an example ❓ “Here’s a perspective we might be missing…” That one line can change the entire conversation. 4️⃣ Embrace deep connections Enough with feeling guilty for skipping massive networking events. ✅ 1 meaningful chat > 10 shallow introductions. → Pick smaller meetups. → Send a personal note instead of generic DMs. 5️⃣ State your preferences Feeling rushed in meetings? 💡 Try: “I’d like some time to reflect—can I follow up later today?” ✅ People respect clarity, especially when it leads to better results. Remember ❌ You don’t have to out-shout the crowd to be heard. ✅ You just need to own who you are. When you lean on your natural strengths: ↳ You feel more energized. ↳ Your confidence comes through - even if it’s quiet. ↳ You leave a deeper impact than forced extroversion ever could.

Networking can feel as awkward as a first date. You’re meeting someone new, trying to make a good impression, and hoping they’ll want to stay in touch (or at least remember your name). Uncomfortable? Sometimes. But it’s also an opportunity to build a meaningful connection. I know this firsthand. Ten years ago, I went on a lot of first dates. What set my now-husband apart? He asked great questions, listened attentively, shared openly, and didn’t dominate the conversation. Turns out, those same strategies work well in networking. Here’s how to apply them: 𝟭. 𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗚𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 (𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻) Ask thoughtful, open-ended questions like: “What excites you most about what you’re working on right now?” “How did you get started in your field?” “What’s a challenge you’re tackling that you’re passionate about?” Then, really listen. Engage. Ask follow-up questions. People remember how you make them feel–and feeling heard builds real connection. 𝟮. 𝗠𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗮 𝗧𝘄𝗼-𝗪𝗮𝘆 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 A bad date? Someone who talks only about themselves. A bad networking conversation? Same. Share your own stories, insights, experiences and interests. Find common ground, build rapport. On our first date, I asked my husband where he wanted to travel next. He said, “the Amalfi Coast.” As fate would have it, I was slated to host a University of Michigan Alumni trip there later that spring. That sparked a deeper conversation about the kind of experiences we value. 𝟯. 𝗠𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗪𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 A great date–and a great networking conversation–ends with both people wanting to stay in touch. Offer something meaningful—an interesting article, a relevant connection, or a thoughtful follow-up message referencing something specific you discussed. My husband ended the first date with, “I like you. When can I see you again?” I wasn’t sure if he was a rookie who didn’t know how to play it cool or refreshingly confident. Turns out, it was the latter. 𝟰. 𝗙𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 𝗨𝗽  Send a quick LinkedIn message or email within 48 hours. Reference something specific from your conversation to show you were paying attention: “It was great meeting you at the event! I loved our conversation about (specific topic). Would love to stay in touch and hear how it progresses!” My husband followed up our first date with a note—and a photo of the wine I ordered that night, sitting in his grocery cart next to some celery. (Yes, really. See the photo below.) 𝗡𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 (𝗟𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗗𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴) 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗠𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 It’s not about racking up LinkedIn connections—it’s about cultivating relationships. Which brings me to the second photo. My husband’s approach to dating eventually led to an invitation to the Amalfi Coast trip. Just not on the first date, like he likes to tell it. What’s your best networking tip or funniest dating story?

I used to drop $1,000 on big conferences, thinking that’s where all the action was happening. Now? Game-changing events > calendar fillers. Turns out, the best convos were always happening at small side events. Recently at TechWeek, I managed to get into a tiny, highly curated event for a Series B+ audience and it was so worth the hustle. This wasn’t a “buy ticket, show up” kind of event. It was more like: find the organizers → reach out directly → dig up mutual intros → prep a killer intro blurb → earn your spot Because even the best pitch means nothing if you’re in the wrong room. Here’s how I decide where to go now, and don’t waste my time (or budget) there: → Research the audience first Check last year’s attendees. Look at the speaker companies. If your ICP isn’t there, don’t go. → Prioritize curated over open-door Events with RSVP forms and shortlists are gold. They take more effort to get into, but the quality of conversation is 10x higher. → Hunt for the small stuff and side events I’ll skip the 2,000-person conference for a 20-person breakfast any day. No booths, no noise — just real people and real context. → Use event curation newsletters I love Supermomos newsletters for finding quality events. Way better than scrolling Eventbrite or Luma for hours. → Don’t stack your day One meaningful event > three mediocre ones. You’ll actually have energy to follow up. Result: I stopped collecting just LinkedIn connections and started landing real leads. And I couldn’t have pulled it off without my assistant — from outreach, to prep, to managing all the behind-the-scenes ops. Great networking starts with choosing the right rooms. And remember: not all events are created equal. Some open doors. Some just fill your calendar. What’s your approach to event strategy?

Networking can feel like a daunting task, especially for us introverts (yes, I’m an introvert #iykyk). Walking into a crowded conference room can sometimes feel more overwhelming than energizing, right? Over the years, I've developed a simple yet powerful framework that helps me navigate these situations with intention and actually get the results I'm looking for. I call it the 3-2-1 Networking Framework. Here's how it works: 🎯 3 Strong Contacts: Instead of aiming to collect a stack of business cards you'll never follow up with, go into your event with the goal of making 3 meaningful connections that can genuinely help you achieve a specific goal. This focus allows you to be more present in conversations and truly remember who you've met. Quality over quantity, always! 🗣️ 2 Small Details: Beyond the business talk, make a conscious effort to remember at least 2 seemingly small, personal details about the people you connect with. Did they mention their child's name? Are they excited about an upcoming vacation? Did you both realize you're part of the same sorority? These personal touches create a stronger, more memorable connection. 💡 Pro-tip: Start with the name! This past week at IIEX, I had a few instances where people mistook me for another researcher. While she's fantastic, it highlighted the importance of truly seeing individuals past basic shared demographics. 📣 Another pro-tip (especially when connecting with Black women): Please remember something other than our hair. Our styles are diverse and can change frequently - at least mine does 🤣. Focusing solely on a hairstyle can lead to missed connections – let's move beyond superficial identifiers and get to the heart of the people. 🚀 1 Must-Do Goal: Walk into your networking event with at least 1 clear, actionable goal. Is it to identify potential business partners, find a new vendor, learn about a specific industry trend, or even land one new client? Having this singular focus will direct your conversations and make your time much more effective. You don't need a laundry list of objectives; sometimes, all it takes is one spark to ignite something bigger and better. This 3-2-1 framework has been a game-changer for me, allowing me to turn up the energy when needed, stay focused, and build authentic connections that truly matter. Give it a try at your next event and let me know how it works for you! #networking #introvert #connections #businesstips #IIEX

If you struggle to keep conversations going during networking, this tip will increase your response rate. Talk about people’s passions. Why? After getting more than 17,000 followers and networking with hundreds of job searchers, I can confidently say that: People love talking about what excites them. It’s an easy way to build rapport. Here’s how I’ve helped 50+ data professionals leverage this strategy to increase response rates and build meaningful relationships: 1️⃣ Do some research. Look at their LinkedIn or portfolio. Find something impressive. 2️⃣ Start with flattery and curiosity. Example: “Hey [Name], I noticed you [accomplishment/project]. That’s incredible! What’s the part you enjoy most about it?” 3️⃣ Follow their passion. Ask questions to show genuine interest. Let the conversation flow naturally. 4️⃣ Find common ground. When they mention something you relate to, dig deeper. Build the connection. 5️⃣ Tie it back to your goal. Shift the conversation to their role or company. Example: “Oh, does your team work on X?” “How does your company approach Y?” For instance, let’s say their passion is travel. You: “That’s awesome! Where’s the most interesting place you’ve been?” Them: “I loved Thailand!” You: “That’s on my list! Did you manage to work remotely while there?” From there, the conversation naturally moves toward their job. Pro Tip: Not everyone will engage, and that’s okay. You don't have to be "perfect" to start networking. Yes, you will still get rejected, that’s part of the game. But you'll get better after multiple iterations. Focus on connecting with the right people. Try this next time you’re stuck in a conversation and let me know how it went.

Forget saying “What do you do?” at a networking event. That’s a rookie move. Leaders don’t make small talk. They make moves. If you're a high-achieving tech pro navigating a layoff, stepping into leadership, or rebuilding after burnout, networking is your secret weapon. But here’s the problem: Most people treat networking like collecting contacts. What actually works? Connection. Emotion. Presence. Here are 7 icebreakers I give my clients who are ready to stop shrinking and start leading: - “What’s something exciting you’re building or learning?” - “What inspired you to come to this event / join this space?” - “How did you get into product/engineering/tech/etc” - “What’s one challenge you’re navigating right now?” - "What’s something people misunderstand about your role?” - “Who here should I make sure to meet before I leave?” Or just comment on the moment. Humor builds trust. Use it. These questions shift you from “awkward job seeker” to “strategic, calm leader," even if you’re in a season of transition. Because here’s the truth: You don’t get hired because of your resume. You get hired because someone remembers you. It's the essence of landing a fantastic role as I've taught to close to 800 rockstars in tech. ⚡You made them feel seen. ⚡You made them think. ⚡You showed up with quiet power and clarity. You've got this rockstar!

"You are so interesting to talk to!" My networking partner said this after our coffee chat last week. Plot twist: I barely talked about myself. For 45 minutes, I asked about her career transition. Her challenges with remote team management. What she was learning about AI implementation. I listened. Asked follow-up questions. Showed genuine curiosity about her experience. She did 80% of the talking. Yet somehow, I was the "interesting" one. This reminded me of something negotiation expert Chris Voss teaches: interested people are interesting!!! It sounds backwards, but it works. The best networking conversations I have had? I spent most of them learning about the other person's journey, not pitching my own. The strongest professional relationships I have built? They started with me asking "What's the most challenging part of your role right now?" instead of leading with my resume. Here's what I have learned about building real connections: Stop trying to be impressive. Start being impressed by others. Ask questions that matter to them. Listen like their answer will teach you something new. Because it probably will. The fastest way to become memorable is to make others feel heard. What's the best question you have been asked in a networking conversation? What made it so good?

In a world where every executive has a firm handshake and a stack of business cards, how do you become the person everyone remembers after a conference? After attending dozens in the past decade, I've developed a strategy that transforms conferences from transactional meetups into relationship goldmines. ♟️Pre-Conference LinkedIn Strategy The real networking begins weeks before the event. Review the speaker and attendee lists, then connect with key individuals on LinkedIn with a personalized message: "I noticed we’re both attending the Stand & Deliver event. I'd love to connect. See you soon." This pre-conference connection creates a warm introduction and significantly increases your chances of meaningful engagement. 👗👔The Memorable Wardrobe Element In my early career, I blended in at conferences. Now? I'm known for wearing a little more color (often D&S Executive Career Management teal) or patterns that are professional yet distinctive. When someone says, "Oh, you're the one with the great dress," you've already won half the networking battle. 🤝Contribute Before You Collect** Instead of collecting business cards, focus on providing immediate value in conversations. Can you connect someone to a resource? Share relevant research? Offer a solution to a challenge they mentioned? The executives who stand out aren't those who take the most cards—they're the ones who solve problems on the spot. What networking approach has worked for you at recent conferences? Share in the comments below! #ExecutiveLeadership #NetworkingStrategy #ConferenceSuccess #ProfessionalDevelopment

This one habit has sparked some of the best conversations of my career. (And most people skip it.) Let me explain. Before every introductory meeting, I scan someone’s LinkedIn and any other information I can find on their organization, their mission, and more. But I’m not looking for the obvious stuff. I’m hunting for the anomalies. → Someone who used to work in gaming that is now working in National Security → Another DePaul grad → A shared connection to Seattle That’s where the real conversation begins. Those little surprises? They build trust fast. And in my experience, the best connections don’t come from agenda-driven meetings. They start from something much simpler: → Curiosity → A little prep → And an unexpected bridge The more I automate what I do, the more I ask myself: How do we build systems without losing the human connection? Because let’s be honest—scaling is great. But what if we can also scale trust? That’s where the real power is. I try to walk into every call with three end goals in mind: → What will be the next steps of this conversation? → One concrete way I can help → One connection to make So I’m curious: → How do you prep for conversations? → What helps you go from small talk to something meaningful? Drop your thoughts below. Let’s swap notes.

The secret to networking that actually works! A few years back, I attended a conference determined to "network." I handed out business cards, shared my elevator pitch, And left with zero meaningful connections. Sound familiar? The problem? I was collecting contacts, not building relationships. The next event, I tried something new: 1. Quality over quantity: Instead of meeting everyone, I focused on truly connecting with 3 people. 2. Ask first, share later: I listened to their goals and challenges before talking about myself. 3. Follow-up like a pro: A quick "great to meet you" message with a personalized touch kept the connection alive. Fast forward, and two of those connections turned into clients. One even referred me to a major partnership. Networking isn’t about selling; it’s about investing in relationships. PS. How do you approach building meaningful connections? Let’s share👇 #networking #coach