How To Make Small Talk With Strangers At Events

Networking can feel as awkward as a first date. You’re meeting someone new, trying to make a good impression, and hoping they’ll want to stay in touch (or at least remember your name). Uncomfortable? Sometimes. But it’s also an opportunity to build a meaningful connection. I know this firsthand. Ten years ago, I went on a lot of first dates. What set my now-husband apart? He asked great questions, listened attentively, shared openly, and didn’t dominate the conversation. Turns out, those same strategies work well in networking. Here’s how to apply them: 𝟭. 𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗚𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 (𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻) Ask thoughtful, open-ended questions like: “What excites you most about what you’re working on right now?” “How did you get started in your field?” “What’s a challenge you’re tackling that you’re passionate about?” Then, really listen. Engage. Ask follow-up questions. People remember how you make them feel–and feeling heard builds real connection. 𝟮. 𝗠𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗮 𝗧𝘄𝗼-𝗪𝗮𝘆 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 A bad date? Someone who talks only about themselves. A bad networking conversation? Same. Share your own stories, insights, experiences and interests. Find common ground, build rapport. On our first date, I asked my husband where he wanted to travel next. He said, “the Amalfi Coast.” As fate would have it, I was slated to host a University of Michigan Alumni trip there later that spring. That sparked a deeper conversation about the kind of experiences we value. 𝟯. 𝗠𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗪𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 A great date–and a great networking conversation–ends with both people wanting to stay in touch. Offer something meaningful—an interesting article, a relevant connection, or a thoughtful follow-up message referencing something specific you discussed. My husband ended the first date with, “I like you. When can I see you again?” I wasn’t sure if he was a rookie who didn’t know how to play it cool or refreshingly confident. Turns out, it was the latter. 𝟰. 𝗙𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 𝗨𝗽  Send a quick LinkedIn message or email within 48 hours. Reference something specific from your conversation to show you were paying attention: “It was great meeting you at the event! I loved our conversation about (specific topic). Would love to stay in touch and hear how it progresses!” My husband followed up our first date with a note—and a photo of the wine I ordered that night, sitting in his grocery cart next to some celery. (Yes, really. See the photo below.) 𝗡𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 (𝗟𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗗𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴) 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗠𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 It’s not about racking up LinkedIn connections—it’s about cultivating relationships. Which brings me to the second photo. My husband’s approach to dating eventually led to an invitation to the Amalfi Coast trip. Just not on the first date, like he likes to tell it. What’s your best networking tip or funniest dating story?

If you struggle to keep conversations going during networking, this tip will increase your response rate. Talk about people’s passions. Why? After getting more than 17,000 followers and networking with hundreds of job searchers, I can confidently say that: People love talking about what excites them. It’s an easy way to build rapport. Here’s how I’ve helped 50+ data professionals leverage this strategy to increase response rates and build meaningful relationships: 1️⃣ Do some research. Look at their LinkedIn or portfolio. Find something impressive. 2️⃣ Start with flattery and curiosity. Example: “Hey [Name], I noticed you [accomplishment/project]. That’s incredible! What’s the part you enjoy most about it?” 3️⃣ Follow their passion. Ask questions to show genuine interest. Let the conversation flow naturally. 4️⃣ Find common ground. When they mention something you relate to, dig deeper. Build the connection. 5️⃣ Tie it back to your goal. Shift the conversation to their role or company. Example: “Oh, does your team work on X?” “How does your company approach Y?” For instance, let’s say their passion is travel. You: “That’s awesome! Where’s the most interesting place you’ve been?” Them: “I loved Thailand!” You: “That’s on my list! Did you manage to work remotely while there?” From there, the conversation naturally moves toward their job. Pro Tip: Not everyone will engage, and that’s okay. You don't have to be "perfect" to start networking. Yes, you will still get rejected, that’s part of the game. But you'll get better after multiple iterations. Focus on connecting with the right people. Try this next time you’re stuck in a conversation and let me know how it went.

I created a simple system to never talk about weather at networking events again: 🌤 ... ⛈️ ... 🌩 I used to default to weather talk at every networking event. Now I have meaningful conversations that lead to real connections. Steal my exact process: Step 1: Identify your favorite conversation topics • Pick 3-4 topics you genuinely enjoy discussing • For me: travel, food, solo biz, personal development • These become your conversation targets Step 2: Plan responses for common small talk questions • Create answers that lead to your preferred topics • Include specific details that invite follow-up questions • Always end with a question to keep conversation flowing Step 3: Practice your responses • Rehearse until they feel natural, not scripted • Adjust based on what gets the best responses • Keep refining until conversations flow easily Real examples from my networking playbook: 👋 When asked "How's business?": "I'm learning to distinguish productive busy from just busy in my solo business. Everyday is a new adventure. What about you - working on anything exciting lately?” 👋 When asked "How are you?": "Energized from traveling to this event! I love connecting face-to-face with coaches after working 20 years in corporate IT. Very different vibe! What about you, what are you working on lately? 👋 When asked "Where are you from?": "St. Louis for over 20 years now. The affordable cost of living helped me launch my solo business last year. How about you?” 👋 When asked "What do you do?": "Former IT project manager who discovered CliftonStrengths and pivoted to become a ghostwriter for coaches. It’s a wild ride! What exciting things are you working on?” TL;DR: • Identify topics you enjoy discussing • Prepare engaging responses to common questions • Practice until your responses feel natural Ten minutes of prep can transforms networking from awkward weather chat to deeper connections. Not a bad way to increase your surface area of luck (to quote my friend Pamela Wilton) ❓What's your go-to response to "So, what do you do?" Share in the comments below! ♻️ Share or repost if you find this helpful! ~ ~ ~ 😀 Hi, I’m Angeline. Content partner for coaches and certified CliftonStrengths Coach 💡 Helping CliftonStrengths® coaches turn workshop attendees into paying clients with automated follow-up emails Top 5: Relator | Arranger | Input | Learner | Responsibility #CliftonStrengths #Coaching #PersonalDevelopment #Ghostwriter #emailseries #leadgen #RecoveringOverthinker

"I go to parties, but no one ever approaches me. Is something wrong with me?" A friend asked me this recently. She’s smart. Charming. Totally magnetic. But there was a problem: Her body language was screaming, "DO NOT APPROACH." Here's how to fix approachability (whether you’re networking or just want better social connections): 1. Open Your Torso Always keep your torso angled toward the room, not closed off. We instinctively avoid approaching people with: • Crossed arms • Something clutched to their chest • Bodies turned away from the crowd Opening your body physically and subconsciously signals "I'm open to conversation." ____ 2. Use "Croissant Feet" When standing or talking, position your feet like a croissant—slightly open toward the room. This subtle stance shows you're physically available for others to join your conversation. ____ 3. Stand in the Strategic Spot Most people stand by the entrance, food, or bathroom. Wrong. The sweet spot: Right where people exit the coffee station with drinks in hand. They're ready to mingle, relaxed, and looking to engage. ____ 4. Master the Eyebrow Flash See someone across the room you want to connect with? Give them a subtle eyebrow raise. It's a universal silent “hello” that works across cultures. Note: It's brief - just a quick flash, not a sustained raise. ____ 5. Wear Conversation Starters I wear my Ravenclaw Harry Potter shirt to the gym. People constantly approach me to talk about houses, favorite characters, or share their Hogwarts stories. Other examples: • College alumni gear • Unique accessories (I wear red shoes that always start conversations) • Name tags with something interesting (I write "Recovering Awkward Person" under my name) ____ 6. Treat Strangers Like Old Friends The energy you bring to an old friend is warm and welcoming. With strangers, we get reserved and boring. Instead of: "Nice to meet you. What do you do?" Try: "Oh, it's so great to meet you! What’s been the highlight of your week?" ____ 7. Be "Smile Ready" (Not Fake Smiley) Don't walk around with a permanent grin - that's weird. Instead, be ready with an authentic smile when something genuinely excites you. Real smiles reach your upper cheek muscles. Save them for moments like "Oh, you got a new puppy? I love dogs! Can I see pictures?" ____ Remember: Approachability isn’t just for extroverts. It’s a skill anyone can practice. Making small adjustments in positioning, posture, and energy can completely transform how others perceive and approach you.

Hardest part about networking is figuring out how to strike up a conversation with the person you want to talk to without it feeling awkward, contrived, or thirsty. My go-to strategy? Ask good questions. And listen more than you talk. A few ways to go about this… 1. Find commonality. Maybe they went to your alma mater, or you both worked at the same company for a period of time. They may share mutual disdain for a competitor (nothing bonds like hatred), or can relate to some of your experiences. Like sports, people often bond over things they can complain about. 2. Show reverence and curiosity. “Hey, I’m a fan of your work on XYZ, that must have been an incredible project to work on…” 3. Look for an easy in. Grab them a beer if they’re running low. If they’re talking to someone you know, seize the moment to get a friendly introduction but don’t overstay your welcome. 4. Lead with humor. Not stand up comedy, just a quick quip to clear the air: “Love your LinkedIn content! I read it more than my emails.” Just think about how you’d want to be approached. You don't have to come prepared, but you do need to be engaging and authentic. 

It’s fall, and you know what that means: It’s networking season! Many people shy away from networking events because they can be uncomfortable. I understand that - it's normal to feel out of place when you don’t know anyone. But what if you had a strategy to turn every event into a meaningful opportunity? Let me share two simple but effective strategies I use to feel more comfortable and maximize my time at large gatherings: My first tip? Always have a question ready. When you’re at a networking event, people will react positively when you approach them. Everyone’s there to network, right? You can go up to someone and ask something easy like, “What are you most excited about right now?” or “Tell me about you.” These questions open the door to deeper conversations that  take you beyond small talk. When they answer you can pick out something to hook onto to bring the conversation to a deeper level. . The second tip? Have a follow-up plan. As you talk, think about ways you can contribute to the person’s life—a relevant article, podcast, or even a LinkedIn connection. By offering something valuable, you create a natural follow-up that helps maintain the relationship. These strategies help you get value from the event. Networking isn’t just about adding more contacts—it’s about building connections that matter. It’s the difference between feeling like you’re just passing out business cards and walking away with relationships that last. Networking events may be contrived, but with practice they can help you achieve your goals. What’s your go-to strategy for making meaningful connections at networking events? #networking  #strategy  #communication

You’re at a networking event. Holding a sweaty plastic cup. Wishing you were home in sweatpants. 🫠 Someone turns to you and says: “So… how was your weekend?” “Busy.” “Cool.” Cue the awkward silence. 🫣 Early in my career, I thought this was just... networking. You make small talk. Exchange business cards. Leave with a lanyard and a vague sense of regret. But small talk never helped me build trust. Or learn anything new. It just filled the air—then vanished. So I started asking better questions. Ones that *actually* sparked connection. Here are 4 questions I now use all the time (and yes, you can steal them): 📌 “What’s something you’re really proud of from the past month?” 📌 “What’s a lesson you’ve learned the hard way in your role?” 📌 “What’s something you’re excited about outside of work?” 📌 “What’s one thing that would make your week 10% better?” Small talk fills silence. But good questions build real relationships. 🙌 ♻️ If this post was helpful, repost it to your network to help others. Follow me Jenny Wood for more content to help you chase what you want, unapologetically.