Maintaining trust during priority negotiations

Negotiation isn’t persuasion; it’s joint problem-solving. Learn six moves that change every deal. Most people think negotiation is about convincing the other side to see things their way. But that’s a trap. Real negotiation is about uncovering shared interests and finding solutions that work for everyone. The problem? Most deals blow up because of blindness, not greed. We focus on positions and miss what truly matters: emotions, perceptions, and the basic human need to be understood. Studies show negotiators who focus on interests instead of positions can create up to 30% more joint value. That’s a game-changer. Here’s how to do it: 1️⃣ Separate the people from the problem. ↳ It’s not about fixing a person, it’s about solving a shared puzzle. 2️⃣ Focus on interests, not positions. ↳ Ask “why” until you understand what’s really driving the other side. 3️⃣ Manage emotions first, logic second. ↳ A calm tone is your best tool for clarity. 4️⃣ Express appreciation. ↳ Listening doesn’t mean agreement; it shows respect. 5️⃣ Reframe criticism as info. ↳ Positive language moves deals faster than blame. 6️⃣ Break the action–reaction cycle. ↳ When pushed, don’t push back; pivot with questions and standards. Here’s the trap: ↳ Don’t reward bad behavior with concessions. That’s the lesson they’ll learn. ↳ Don’t mirror aggression; redirect curiosity instead. How have I used this? Once, during a supplier-client chat, both sides insisted their price was final. I paused and asked, “What would make this deal work for you?” Minutes later, they revealed key priorities: one needed cash flow now, the other needed reliability later. Trading those interests unlocked a win-win package. Next time someone digs in on a disagreement, try that approach. It’s way better than arguing over who’s “right.” What’s one “people problem” you’ve turned into a value-creating solution? 📌 Save this for your next tough conversation. ♻️ Share if you still see teams debating positions instead of interests.

Saying "yes" feels right, but "no" can save your project. And also save your client’s trust. Last week I had a tough time with one of my clients. Firefighting with a last-minute high-priority request. → The request was outside the scope. → No one is trained to do it. → And, I need to deliver it next week. These unrealistic expectations are nothing new in project management. I had two choices to respond to this conversation: 1/ Say yes and rush to finish. 2/ Have a tough conversation and protect the project. I chose the second. It would have been easier to say: ↳ "I’ll move things around and figure it out." ↳ "It’s tight, but I’ll make it happen somehow." The first option feels easier. You want to be helpful. You want to be seen as a problem solver. But what happens when you agree to unrealistic expectations. Particularly the one that is unclear. → They lead to mistakes. → Mistakes lead to rework. → Rework leads to missed deadlines and broken trust. Here’s a better way to handle such situations: → Listen and acknowledge the urgency. → Explain the impact of rushing. → Offer a structured way to address the request. For example: "Let’s do this right, not just fast. If we rush, we’ll need to redo work later. Instead of squeezing it in, let’s reprioritize, consult the team and review the impact. Please submit a change request so we can assess it properly." Will it be uncomfortable? Yes, it will be. Will there be push back? Yes, there will be. But in the end, your client will respect the process. You’ll save your project from scope creep. The team will trust you. Difficult conversations aren’t about saying NO. They’re about setting clear expectations, so projects actually succeed.

When negotiating, do you think the big wins happen at the table? They don't! The real magic happens before the first word is spoken. Success in 80% of negotiations is due to preparation. It's taking small steps to control the process, foresee challenges, and set small goals. I coached a procurement manager stuck in a deadlock with a supplier. Both sides had drawn firm lines: • The supplier demanded upfront payments. • The procurement team refused. • They feared cash flow issues. For weeks, the talk had gone in circles. It made no progress. When I stepped in, I asked one question: “𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙?” The team realized the supplier's main concern wasn't money. It was to reduce delivery risks. By focusing on interests, not positions, we found a solution: 𝗔 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘂𝗽𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗻𝘁 𝗽𝗮𝘆𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁, 𝗽𝗹𝘂𝘀 𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗽𝗮𝘆𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝘁𝗶𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗽𝗵𝗮𝘀𝗲𝘀. The result? The deal closed in two days, with terms that worked for both sides. That negotiation taught me this: →  Preparation isn't just logical. → It's also strategic and emotional. I'm happy to share here how I prepare for a negotiation: 𝗦𝗲𝘁 𝗦𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗧 𝗴𝗼𝗮𝗹𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗲. • Be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. • No vague goals like “get the best deal,” aim for concrete outcomes: → Add a long-term partnership clause → Reduce delivery timelines by 10% → Secure flexible payment terms 𝗙𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀, 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀. • Ask, why does the other side want this? • When you negotiate based on interests, you create options that meet both parties’ needs. 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗠𝘂𝗹𝘁𝗶𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝘀 (𝗠𝗘𝗦𝗢𝘀) • Successful comes with always having options ready. For example: → Offer A: A 5% discount for upfront payments. → Offer B: Standard payment terms and extended service coverage. If you present choices, you reduce deadlock and keep control of the conversation. 𝗨𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲. 𝗡𝗲𝗴𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝗴𝗶𝗰—𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. • Practice self-awareness to stay composed under pressure. • Show empathy to build trust. • Use "Feel, Felt, Found" on objections, and it'll guide decisions. Negotiation is like a dance. Both sides need to move in sync, adjusting their steps as they go, to create a harmonious outcome. And the best dances are choreographed long before the music starts. So, what’s been your biggest negotiation breakthrough? Have you ever unlocked a deal by shifting focus from demands to solutions? Found success by preparing better than your counterpart? Drop your story in the comments—I’d love to hear it. Or DM me if this resonates with a challenge you’re navigating. Let’s talk about what works.

I had a great time this week reviewing the Value Negotiation Framework that I learned at business school (thank you, Horacio Falcao and INSEAD) with a global group of #accountmanagers. Most of the Account Managers I know avoid negotiation - it can feel uncomfortable, icky, risky, or just too hard. But great Account Managers (the top 1%) know that negotiation is a way to build relationships, increase trust, and improve outcomes for all sides. Here’s how we can help you get comfortable with negotiation and make it a powerful tool: 1. Focus on Your Client’s True Priorities Before discussing numbers, make sure you understand what really matters to the client (their "interests"). Whether it’s reliability, adaptability, or price flexibility, when you know their top interests, you can structure a solution that speaks directly to their needs - often without reaching for a discount. 2. Think Trade-Offs Over Discounts Discounts can devalue your service and set a lower expectation for future negotiations. Instead, offer trade-offs that add value, like flexible terms or enhanced service. This approach protects your revenue while reinforcing the partnership. 3. Use Data to Back Your Value Bring concrete proof to the table. Real data, client results, and industry benchmarks strengthen your position and show the client exactly what your solutions are worth. Numbers and stats can be powerful when it comes to demonstrating value and framing your offering. 4. Set Clear, Mutual Commitments Early Define your commitments and align them with your client’s goals from day one. This way, every part of the partnership, from renewals to new initiatives, reflects shared objectives. Consistent check-ins on these goals will reinforce the relationship and provide a natural basis for successful negotiations. Get really good at negotiating, and you’ll see the impact on your client relationships - and your bottom line.