Crafting Messages That Resonate With Major Donors

3 donor emails that aren’t “asks” but still bring in donations We all know the direct asks matter. But some of the most effective emails I’ve helped send aren’t official campaigns or appeals. They’re moments of relationship. Here are 3 types of emails that donors seem to love and that often lead to surprise gifts: ⸻ 📬 1. The “We Did the Thing” Email Subject: We just finished it. Thank you. You promised to build a playground / fund a program / send kids to camp. This email says: We did. Because of you. Photos. A quote. A short paragraph. That’s it. People love seeing the result of their generosity. 📬 2. The “Saw This and Thought of You” Email Subject: This made me think of you. It might be a story from the field. A note from a beneficiary. Even a newspaper article. You send it to 1–5 specific donors with a personal sentence like: “You’ve always cared about ___, and this reminded me of you.” It’s not a pitch. It’s a connection. And it works. 📬 3. The “No Reason but Gratitude” Email Subject: No ask. Just thanks. A short note that simply says: “We’re so grateful for you. No updates, no links—just gratitude.” I do this quarterly. You’d be amazed how many people hit reply with: “How can I help?” Fundraising is more than asking. It’s paying attention. It’s following up. It’s letting people feel the difference they make. Which of these have you tried or would you add a fourth to the list?

Your fundraising appeals keep failing for one reason. It's not your subject line. It's not your donation page. It's not your ask amount. It's not even your story. It's that you're talking about yourself instead of your donor. Count the words "we," "us," and "our" in your last appeal. Now count "you" and "your." If the first number is higher, you've found your problem. Your donors don't care about your organization's needs. They care about the impact they can make through you. The organizations raising more money aren't writing better appeals about themselves. They're writing better appeals about their donors. They don't say "We need your support." They say "You can change a life." They don't say "Our programs are effective." They say "Your gift creates transformation." They don't say "Help us meet our goal." They say "Your impact will multiply when you give today." Pull out your last three fundraising appeals. Highlight every sentence that focuses on your organization rather than your donor's impact. Rewrite each one to put your donor at the center. Because your appeals aren't failing because of poor technique. They're failing because you've made yourself the hero of the story instead of your donor. Fix that, and watch your response rates transform.

Many donor conversations focus on what we want from them. These 5 questions focus on what matters to them: 1. "What first connected you to our mission?" (Reveals their personal story and values alignment) 2. "Of everything we do, what resonates most with you?" (Identifies which aspects of your work they value most) 3. "What impact would you most like to see your support create?" (Uncovers their vision and aspirations) 4. "How would you prefer to stay connected with our work?" (Respects their communication preferences) 5. "Who else in your life might find meaning in this work?" (Opens doors to their network naturally) The magic happens in the follow-up: "Tell me more about that..." Then, you can mirror: "It sounds like you're saying that..." These questions transform transactional interactions into relationship-building conversations. They signal that you value the person, not just their wallet. I've seen these questions uncover major gift opportunities, reveal passionate volunteers, identify board prospects, and most importantly—build authentic relationships that last. What's your go-to question when speaking with donors?

Before it was about getting donors to write checks. Now it’s about involving them in your ecosystem. Here’s 5 steps to get started today: You’re not just fundraising anymore. You’re onboarding stakeholders. If you want repeatable, compounding revenue from donors, partners, and decision-makers, you need to stop treating them like check-writers… …and start treating them like collaborators in a living system. Here’s how. 1. Diagnose your “center of gravity” Most orgs center fundraising around the mission. But the real gravitational pull for donors is their identity. → Ask yourself: What is the identity we help our funders step into? Examples: Systems Disruptor. Local Hero. Climate Investor. Opportunity Builder. Build messaging, experiences, and invites around that identity, not just impact stats. 2. Turn every program into a flywheel for new capital Stop separating “program delivery” from “fundraising.” Your programs are your best sales engine → Examples: • Invite donors to shadow frontline staff for one hour • Allow funders to sponsor a real-time decision and see the outcome • Let supporters “unlock” bonus services for beneficiaries through engagement, not just cash People fund what they help shape. 3. Use feedback as a funding mechanism Most orgs treat surveys as box-checking. But used right, feedback is fundraising foreplay. → Ask donors and partners to co-define what “success” looks like before you report back. Then build dashboards, stories, and events around their metrics. You didn’t just show impact. You made them part of the operating model. 4. Make your “thank you” do heavy lifting Thanking donors isn’t the end of a transaction. It’s the first trust test for future collaboration. → Instead of a generic “thank you,” send: • A 1-minute voice memo with a specific insight you gained from their gift • A sneak peek at a challenge you’re tackling and ask for their perspective • A micro-invite: “Can I get your eyes on something next week?” You’re not closing a loop. You’re opening a door. 5. Build a “Donor OS” (Operating System) Every funder should have a journey, not just a transaction history. → Track things like: • What insight made them first say “I’m in”? • Who do they influence (and who influences them)? • What kind of risk are they comfortable taking? • What internal narrative did your mission fulfill for them? Then tailor comms, invitations, and roles accordingly. Not everyone needs another newsletter but someone does want a seat at the strategy table. With purpose and impact, Mario

I’ve seen many fundraisers with years of experience fail to answer this simple question… Why should donors give to YOU? We often forget that people don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it. Too often, nonprofits jump straight to the how and what of their work (programs, events, activities) without clearly articulating their why. But the why is what inspires action. It’s what connects emotionally with donors and gives meaning to your mission. Once you clearly identify your why, it becomes much easier to craft a value proposition that showcases the real impact you bring and why it matters. A strong value proposition answers: 🔹 What’s the problem? 🔹 Why does it matter? 🔹 What does your organization do to solve it? The overlap of these answers helps you communicate your mission in a way that resonates deeply with supporters. Here's the difference it makes: ❌ “We’ve worked for 25 years to combat hunger through food distribution and innovative programs.” (Organization focused) ✅ “Your gift provides a warm meal to a hungry child, giving them the nourishment to grow and thrive.” (Donor focused) Which would you rather give to? Your value proposition is how you express your comparative advantage from the donor’s perspective. It’s not about your longevity or your activities. It’s about the difference their support makes. Start with your why. The rest will follow.

Most fundraising appeals are too polite. Too indirect. Too passive. Too focused on what 𝘸𝘦 do— instead of what the donor makes possible. If you want more clarity, more confidence, and more response in your writing, start here: 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝘀𝗼𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗮𝗰𝘁. 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝘄𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽. I call it 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗙𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗿𝗮𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴. And it looks like this: “Together, we help feed people” ➡️ “You feed hungry people” “You are helping provide education” ➡️ “You’re educating children” “With your support, we can offer shelter” ➡️ “You provide shelter to those in need” “Thanks to you, we’re able to offer medical assistance” ➡️ “You’re delivering lifesaving medical care” “Your donations support our advocacy efforts” ➡️ “You’re championing human rights” This isn’t about semantics. It’s about 𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵. When the donor sees themselves as the one acting, they feel agency. They feel urgency. They feel 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥. So cut the qualifiers. Eliminate the disclaimers. And write like the donor is the one holding the pen. 𝗕𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲. What’s one sentence in your next appeal you can rewrite with 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘳 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 at the center?

I do not write grants. I write about opportunities. I do not ask for donations. I ask for partnerships. I do not build capacity. I build connections. Here’s what I’ve learned in 20+ years of working with nonprofits: The words you use can determine whether your mission thrives—or gets overlooked. When we talk about “grants,” “donations,” or “capacity building,” we’re focusing on what we need. But when we shift the language to “opportunities,” “partnerships,” and “connections,” we focus on the bigger picture—the shared impact we can create. That subtle shift? It’s the difference between asking and inspiring. Between pitching and partnering. One of my favorite examples is a client who struggled with fundraising for years. They were stuck in the cycle of “we need help.” But when we reframed their mission around opportunities for impact—and built stories around the lives their work touched—they didn’t just hit their fundraising goals. They doubled them. What changed? ✨ Their messaging became magnetic. ✨ Partners wanted to collaborate, not just contribute. ✨ Funders saw themselves as part of the story. It’s not just about what you’re asking for. It’s about how you’re inviting people into your mission. So, here’s my challenge to you: 👉 Stop writing proposals. Start writing possibilities. 👉 Stop chasing dollars. Start fostering alignment. 👉 Stop focusing on transactions. Start building relationships. Because when you lead with vision, you open the door to something far greater than money—you build momentum that transforms communities. How are you currently positioning your mission? Is your messaging unlocking doors, or holding you back? ----- Hi, I’m Shannon—a nonprofit consultant, fractional fundraiser & marketer, and proud mom of autistic twins. As a certified human rights advocate, I’m all about making sure every voice is heard. Imagine fundraising as a road trip: you’ve got the destination, and I’m here to help you navigate the route, dodge the bumps, and keep the journey exciting. From creative strategies to real talk about what works, I love diving into conversations that spark change and keep you moving forward. Let’s connect! Send me a message, and let’s see how we can fuel up your fundraising journey together!

I sent the same appeal to 10,000 donors. One version raised $67,000. The other raised $142,000. The only difference? Where I put the word "you." Donor-centered writing isn't just nice—it's profitable: • "You" in the first sentence increases response by 23% • Stories about donors (not beneficiaries) raise more money • Questions outperform statements in both open and response rates One organization rewrote their case statement from "we need" to "you can" language and saw major gift closes increase by 41%. The most powerful word in fundraising isn't "give"—it's "you." What small language shift has made the biggest difference in your fundraising?