Best Ways to Connect With Major Donors

Many donor conversations focus on what we want from them. These 5 questions focus on what matters to them: 1. "What first connected you to our mission?" (Reveals their personal story and values alignment) 2. "Of everything we do, what resonates most with you?" (Identifies which aspects of your work they value most) 3. "What impact would you most like to see your support create?" (Uncovers their vision and aspirations) 4. "How would you prefer to stay connected with our work?" (Respects their communication preferences) 5. "Who else in your life might find meaning in this work?" (Opens doors to their network naturally) The magic happens in the follow-up: "Tell me more about that..." Then, you can mirror: "It sounds like you're saying that..." These questions transform transactional interactions into relationship-building conversations. They signal that you value the person, not just their wallet. I've seen these questions uncover major gift opportunities, reveal passionate volunteers, identify board prospects, and most importantly—build authentic relationships that last. What's your go-to question when speaking with donors?

If I were a Chief Development Officer of a large nonprofit and I needed to make a big push in major gifts before the calendar year ends, here’s exactly what I’d do 👇 Revenue doesn’t come from activity. It comes from intentionality. 🔹 Step 1: Identify your real portfolio Not the 200 names in Salesforce. The 30–50 donors who actually have capacity and momentum. (If you can’t name them without opening a report, start there.) 🔹 Step 2: Map out your warmest relationships Find the people who already know, like, and trust your org. Past donors. Active volunteers. Longtime advocates. You don’t need new prospects. You need to wake up the ones you’ve been sleeping on. 🔹 Step 3: Time-block for actual engagement Not stewardship emails. Not mass updates. I’m talking real conversations. Discovery calls. In-person touchpoints. Put them on the calendar and protect that time like your Q4 depends on it. Because it does. 🔹 Step 4: Track sentiment, not just dollars How do your top donors feel about your mission right now? Where are they in the journey? If all you’re tracking is “gave or didn’t give,” you’re already behind. 🔹 Step 5: Prioritize your closeable pipeline That $1M prospect who hasn’t returned a call in 7 months? Not your focus. That $50K donor who just had lunch with your board chair? That’s your move. Focus on proximity, timing, and intent. 🔹 Step 6: Make your system work for your fundraisers If your team is digging through reports, toggling tabs, or building lists from scratch… they’re wasting time. You need tools that surface the right relationships at the right time, not just store data. If you do this. Day in and day out, I promise you will see results with major gifts. It works with consistency and a team that is all-in across the board. No more rogue gift officers who have been “doing things their way” forever.

Your major donor just called and listed out all of their frustrations. You won't like what they had to say. It wasn't about money. It wasn't about competing priorities. It wasn't about the economy. It was about you. "They never told me what my gift accomplished," they said. "I gave $25,000 and got a form letter thank you. Then nothing for eight months." "When I finally called to ask about impact, they couldn't give me specifics. Just vague statements about 'helping the community.'" "I realized they didn't see me as a partner. They saw me as an ATM." ‼️ The organizations losing major donors aren't victims of donor fatigue. They're victims of donor neglect. ‼️ Your major donors don't leave because they can't afford to give. They leave because you can't afford to care. Pull up your major donor communications from the last year. For each donor over $10,000, ask: 👉 Did they receive specific impact reports tied to their gift? 👉 Did someone call them personally within 3-5 days? 👉 Did they get invited to see their impact firsthand? 👉 Did you ask for their input on organizational direction? If you answered "no" to any of these, you've got a problem. The most successful major donor programs I work with treat donors like investors, not transactions: 👉 They provide quarterly impact reports with specific outcomes. 👉 They invite donors to strategic planning conversations. 👉 They offer behind-the-scenes access to programs and leadership. 👉 They ask for advice, not just money. Your major donors aren't leaving because they don't care about your mission. They're leaving because you don't care about them. Fix your relationship problem before you blame donor capacity. Because in fundraising, how you treat donors after they give determines whether they'll give again.