Tips for Active Listening and Empathy in Sales

The better I get at sales, the less I talk. Early in my career, I thought being good at sales meant being the most charismatic one in the room. Talk fast, sound smart, and keep the energy high. The better I get, the more I shut up. I’ve always been a listener. I've always watched how people move, what they say, what they don’t say. Communication, verbal and nonverbal, is one of my favorite things to study. Also... I’m a Scorpio. So let’s be real, reading people is my hobby and my job. Now I coach my team to do the same. → Let the buyer talk → Ask better questions → Sit in the silence and see what comes up You don’t need to expose “pain.” You need to uncover what matters to people. What they’re settling for. What they wish was easier. What’s annoying but tolerated. One of my favorite examples of this is a group I worked with called Pacific Counter. Scaling wasn’t front and center in every conversation, but I kept hearing little comments. Subtle signals. Enough to know it was a priority they hadn't fully said out loud. So, I paid attention. Aaand now they’re growing like crazy. I helped with that!!! Here are some questions I’ve used to unlock real conversations: “What’s taking up more of your time than it should right now?” “What would you love to stop thinking about?” “How are you managing that today?” Sales isn’t about performing. It’s about understanding. You’ll be surprised what people say when you stop trying to impress them and start actually listening. #sales #salesleadership #curiousity #tacticalempathy

I bet most of you haven't heard of this… What? “𝘓𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴.” I've been an executive coach and a marriage counselor for over 30 years. I've engaged with thousands of leaders and couples. And if I have to pinpoint one thing that most of them fail at, it'll be, 𝘓𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴. Not just hearing.  Not just listening. It doesn't matter how often your employees give you their feedback or how frequently your partner may say something. They can talk all they want, but if you fail to listen and comprehend—nothing is ever going to change. In fact, things will just go downhill. 𝘚𝘰 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴? Well, it requires intentionality, patience, an open mind, and a desire to truly understand. Here’s the roadmap laid out for you: 𝐆𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐀𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 📌Focus completely on the speaker. Put away distractions like phones or other devices. 📌Maintain eye contact to show you're engaged and attentive. 📌Show genuine non-verbal cues like nodding or using facial expressions to indicate your interest. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐒𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤. 📌Avoid interrupting or finishing the speaker's sentences. Let them express themselves fully. 📌Be patient, especially if the speaker is hesitant or takes time to articulate their thoughts. 📌Do not be thinking about your response, but remain in the moment. 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. 📌Pay attention to the speaker's tone of voice, pitch, volume, and body language. Emotions often manifest in these aspects. 📌Look for signs of frustration, excitement, sadness, or other emotional cues. 𝐀𝐬𝐤 𝐎𝐩𝐞𝐧-𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. 📌Encourage the speaker to share more by asking questions that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." 📌Examples include "𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭?" or "𝘊𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵?" 𝐄𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐑𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭. 📌Show empathy by acknowledging the speaker's feelings and experiences. You can say, "𝘐 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶." or “𝘐 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦.” 📌Reflect back on what you've heard to confirm your understanding. For example, "𝘚𝘰, 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨..." 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫: Listen to understand–not just reply. #leadershipcoach #executivecoach #leadershipdevelopment

Picture this: Your seven-year-old nephew is selling raffle tickets door to door. On Monday, he knocked on 10 doors and sold 5 tickets. But on Tuesday, he knocked on 10 doors, and only one person answered. That person flat out rejected him. The following day, he tells you he’s upset and doesn’t want to knock on any more doors. What words of wisdom would you give him? That’s the scenario Jules Steindler 🥳 asked several months ago in her post. Sales pros in the comments responded by saying things like this: “The law of averages is on your side. For every bad day, you’ll get another good one.” “Never give up! Keep hustling!” “Today is already old news. Tomorrow holds so much potential.” Although these statements sound good in theory, they don’t make the other person feel heard. Instead, they minimize the hurt the other person is going through. Advice like this ignores how the other person is feeling. I don’t believe people do this intentionally. Statements like these are a reflex response intended to make the other person feel better. Perhaps someone said these things to you. The way out? Let go of the idea that it’s your job to have all the answers. Shift from being an expert to listening. Acknowledge how the other person is feeling without trying to solve anything. Here are some examples of what reflective listening sounds like: “Only one person answered? Wow, that really sucks.” “It’s frustrating to get rejected.” “I can see how upset you are.” “Seems like you’re disappointed.” “You were hoping more people would answer.” “I’m proud of you. It takes a lot of courage to knock on doors.” “What good might come out of trying again tomorrow?” There is no script for empathy. It’s less about what you say and more about listening without solving. But I hope this example helps you find ways to be more empathetic with people in your personal and business life.

Here is how to truly understand your prospects (4 immediate steps you can take after reading this post) 1. Listen first     Start by focusing entirely on your prospect during calls. Resist the urge to jump in with your pitch How to do it • Listen without interrupting • Take notes on key points they mention • Show genuine interest in their challenges • Listening first sets the stage for a meaningful conversation 2. Ask open ended questions     Instead of making statements ask questions to uncover their true needs and challenges Key questions • What are your biggest challenges right now? • How are you currently addressing these issues? • What outcomes are you looking to achieve?    Asking open ended questions helps you gather valuable insights 3. Reflect and summarize     After listening reflect back on what you've heard to ensure understanding and show that you value their perspective How to do it • Summarize their main points • Confirm your understanding by asking “Did I get that right?” • Use their language to reflect back their needs    Reflecting back builds trust and confirms that you’re on the same page 4. Show empathy     Demonstrate that you understand and care about their situation. Empathy goes a long way in building rapport How to do it • Acknowledge their challenges • Share similar experiences or solutions you’ve seen work • Express your genuine desire to help them succeed Empathy turns a conversation into a partnership 🤝 If you follow these four steps you'll build stronger relationships and become a trusted advisor to your prospects P.S. What techniques do you use to ensure you truly understand your prospects? Share your thoughts in the comments! ----- If you found this useful. Repost to help others ♻️

Too many people view client relationships as transactional. You sign a contract. Send the invoice. Close the client. But I’ve realized that the best client relationships are built on genuine personal connections. This means: - Knowing who you're working with - Understanding their days - Empathizing with them Business and life are not mutually exclusive. Asking about a client's family, hobbies, and goals shows that you care for more than just their business. The problem is that most agencies don’t understand that clients can hire anyone to do their work. They chose you. And often, not just to solve a problem. Clients want to work with great people- not just great companies. There are 5 ways that I infuse this ideology into my interactions with our clients: 1. Be yourself. You don’t need to act a certain way just because “that's expected.” Show up with the attributes that make you, you. 2. Address issues head-on with empathy and transparency. When in doubt, I’ve found being overly transparent works better than being guarded. Vulnerability engenders trust. 3. Practice active listening in meetings. Give your full attention, ask thoughtful questions, and mirror back what you hear. Make your clients feel heard and understood. 4. Spend 5 mins at the start of the meeting just chatting. It’s easy and goes a long way. 5. Share relevant articles and books, make introductions—whatever you can do to add value and show you actually care. And when they talk, really listen. Don’t just wait for your turn to speak, Hear what they’re saying. And the irony is that getting personal is how you get profitable with clients. They’ll be more likely to refer business You’ll get grace during the tough moments And they’ll be more likely to stay on longer When building relationships, aim for a trusted advisor, not an order taker.

The most underrated skill in cybersecurity marketing and sales: Active listening. I once hosted a podcast episode between a security buyer and a vendor. And in the 54 minutes of the buyer interview, I spoke for 4 minutes and 32 seconds. (Remind me to analyze how long I talked vs. listening on all of my podcasts) The value in that 54 minutes was in my active listening. Active listening is: A ridiculously valuable skill that involves fully concentrating on what someone is saying, understanding their message, and responding appropriately. Why is active listening important for you? It enhances your communication skills It helps you build strong relationships with people It reduces misunderstandings and conflicts (we all know that occurs way too often between buyers and vendors) It improves your problem-solving abilities Here are some tips to practice active listening: Give your full attention to the speaker. Avoid interrupting them (if you do, pause, let them repeat and continue). Ask open-ended questions. Then ask clarifying questions (again) after you ask open-ended questions (this is called probing). Reflect on what they're saying. Respond thoughtfully. Make active listening a habit and you will see a significant improvement in your communication skills and relationships. Try it for your next 8 customer conversations... Hell, try it with your teammates...and see what happens. #marketing #cybersecurity #custommerresearch #audience1st

Everyone knows it's important to be a good listener, but perhaps there's not enough focus on actually improving our listening skills. So how can we be better listeners? Here are 5 tips: 1️⃣ Allow for moments of silence. If there's a pause in the conversation, let the speaker think of additional thoughts they want to share. Don't automatically fill in the gap with your own thoughts. 2️⃣ Show empathy. Especially when someone is sharing something personal or emotional, make sure your verbal responses and body language show that you care, that you're paying attention, and that you want to help. 3️⃣ Have an attitude of learning. Make it your goal to learn something from others, which can help you pay better attention and process what's being said to you. 4️⃣ Recharge before meetings or big conversations. Move around a little bit, go for quick walk, get some fresh air, or do some stretching. All any of these activities will get your blood flowing, make you feel more awake, boost your energy, and help you stay focused. 5️⃣ Be honest about your time and availability. If a team member wants to chat while you're busy or feeling stressed, be honest and let them know it's not a good time. Make sure you schedule a plan or time to talk with them later. #1 and #5 have helped me manage my impatience and tendency to finish people’s sentences when they take “too long.” I'm far from perfect, but just these two changes have helped me be a much more considerate listener. Any tips that have helped you?

Many may not be listening to what you are really saying? 20 years ago, I was completing modules for my initial coach training. Our assignment was to coach a surrogate student for one hour. Module was Practice Active Listening One hour ONLY asking various types of powerful questions. At first, this was very awkward listening then only asking questions. I distinctly remember that moment shifting from my head to the heart. Discoveries from my first Coachee: * Being in the Moment * The Power in the Pause * Trusting Them Without an Agenda * Being Present With Their Experience The Coachee said, wow, that was an extraordinary experience! What value would you place on a greater connection with your clients, colleagues and family? In the Coaching Context, What Active Listening is Not: - About You - Interrogation - Agenda Driven - Coach Making Statements Desire to be heard? Practice the Art and Skill of Active Listening. Active Listening: * Fosters Empathy * Grows Connection * Expands Capacity * Opens Powerful Discovery * Uncovers the Root of the Situation * Being Fully Present Builds Trust * Creates a Space for Transformation Tips for Effective Active Listening: 1. Discovery to Action 2. Questions from honor 3. Ask Curiosity Questions 4. Avoid Making Statements 5. Call to Actions with Clarity 6. Create Judgement Free Space 7. Listen to Understand not to Agree/Disagree Active listening is a transformative skill that can be learned. Empowering actions can take place through active listening. Active listening will fuel innovation. >> How do you feel when someone is actively listening to you? << + My Purpose is Your Growth! DM me or schedule a 20 minute free coaching consultation to explore your coaching possibilities. > I have had the honor of coaching leaders for 20 years. > I have had over 25 years of being in business. Or visit: www[dot]TRUFORTH[dot]co

In our industry, there is such a push for technical training that I think we have lost sight of what supporting our teams really consists of. I think that we need to start training our people differently. In school we are taught chemistry, biology, and math but not how to deal with anxiety or stress. Yes, how to work flow a Submittal or RFI is absolutely important, but if we don’t train our teams about emotional regulation or how to manage the loads of stress that are intertwined in the professional world, we are setting them up for failure. I know, I know…we aren’t therapists and can’t teach that “kind of stuff to our people”. I challenge that corporate norm as there is something you can do about it that doesn’t involve anyone but you! You can change this story with the folks that you collaborate with and it starts with the environment and culture we build on our teams. Empathy is an emotional and thinking muscle that becomes stronger with use. 1️⃣Listen actively 👂🏽 With an open mind, open eyes and open ears. Do not interrupt. Withold judgement. 2️⃣Be fully present ✋🏽 Pay attention to body language, tone of voice and hidden emotions. Be aware of your own body language as well. 3️⃣Take interest 👀 Have genuine curiosity about other people. Ask questions with an intention to help or build relationship. 4️⃣Encourage and support the team 👏🏽 As a leader take time to listen, protect and empower the quiet ones. Recognize individual contribution. In life there are only a few guarantees, but I can guarantee you that if you start to practice the above you will see your people flourish. Walls will start to come down and that is where the magic happens. We move from disconnected siloes to integrated collaborators. #emotionalregulation #softskills #traininganddevelopment #anxietymanagement #stressmanagement

𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐘 > 𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓 > 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐓 > 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 . . . That's the flow in almost every successful sales conversation. Sales is not about pushing products. It’s about pulling customers closer. Empathy & understanding become your power tools. 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞:- ❌ Empathy is not about agreeing with or condoning someone’s actions. ✅ It’s about understanding the other person’s actions, not necessarily agreeing with them. Imagine a sales call where you feel truly heard, where the salesperson on the other hand understands your challenges. Decision making becomes a breeze because you start trusting this person. That’s what builds rapport. That’s what builds trust. That’s what triggers an action. 9 out of 10 sales leaders we talk to at Enthu.AI mention lack of Empathy by their frontline agents as one of their primary challenges. While sales leaders understand the importance of empathy, they are always restrained by ways to measure it. 𝐅𝐞𝐰 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐲; 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬 1️⃣ Warm & friendly tone: It’s about how it is said, rather than what is said. 2️⃣ Active listening: Statements like “I understand”, “I see what you mean” convey active listening. 3️⃣ Empathetic language: “I am sorry”, “Looks like you are dealing with too much”, ”Thank you for sharing” etc. 4️⃣ Open ended questions: So that prospects can talk about their challenges in detail. 5️⃣ Acknowledging objections: Rather than just jumping into rebuttals, acknowledge the objection. 6️⃣ Providing solutions: Tailoring solution to the customer needs and asking for their acknowledgement. 7️⃣ Taking feedback: In the end, collecting feedback from the prospects about their interaction. Want to fast track Empathy measurement for your sales team? Try uploading a sales conversation here and see the results (no login required) https://lnkd.in/gavbykKE It can measure empathy across every single conversation and indicate those agents who need coaching, without the need to listen to endless call recordings.