Why Reputations Are Slow to Change

Changing ingrained behaviors and habits is hard. Changing your reputation after you’ve made those changes is even harder. People are still walking around with the old version of you in their heads, and frankly, they’re not paying close enough attention to notice you’ve leveled up. You’ve done the internal work and broken the patterns but your colleagues are still expecting the person who used to scramble at deadlines or avoid difficult conversations or whatever your old thing was. Your reputation is basically everyone else’s highlight (lowlight?) reel of your past mistakes and quirks, and they’re not exactly rushing to update their mental files. The tricky part is that you can’t just announce “Hey everyone, I’m different now!” and expect people to believe you. They need to see it, experience it, and have enough new data points that they can’t ignore the shift. Most of us get frustrated because we expect our transformed habits to immediately translate into different treatment and opportunities. But reputation change is slow, then fast. You need to stack enough evidence that people have no choice but to update their assumptions about who you are. Here are five ways to speed up the process without feeling like you’re bragging about your personal growth journey: 1. Tell specific stories, not vague transformation tales. Instead of saying “I’ve gotten better at time management,” share the story about how you restructured that chaotic project timeline and actually delivered early. Give people concrete evidence they can remember. 2. Go where nobody knows your old reputation. Volunteer for a cross-departmental initiative or join the committee where people haven’t witnessed your previous patterns. These become your reputation reset opportunities where you can show up as your new self from day one. 3. Have the awkward conversation with key people. Seriously, just tell your boss or closest collaborators that you’ve been working on specific changes and ask them to call you out if they see old patterns creeping back in. Yes, it’s vulnerable but it fast-tracks their awareness of your evolution. 4. Ask for feedback like early and often. Check in regularly with people whose opinions matter and ask what they’re noticing about how you’re showing up differently. This keeps your transformation visible and gives you intel on where the old reputation might still be sticking. 5. Play the long game without losing momentum. Your new habits need time to become your new reputation, just like it took time for your old reputation to solidify. Keep being consistent because eventually, the new pattern becomes so obvious that people forget you were ever any other way. #coaching #leadership #feedback

I googled a founder before a potential collaboration last week. What I found was painful. First result: A 3-year-old interview about his "revolutionary" product. Second result: An article about his company pivoting from the original idea. Third result: His outdated LinkedIn profile mentioning the old business. Meanwhile, his current company is crushing it.  But the internet doesn't know that. And it’s not supposed to know on its own if you don’t share it. This is not just with one or two founders, this is very common. The online reputation is still stuck in the past  While the business moves into the future. That article about your "failed" venture?  It doesn't mention you learned from it and built something better. That old interview about your startup pivot?  It makes you look indecisive, not adaptable. That outdated profile mentioning your previous role?  It's not showing the leader you've become. The problem isn't what happened before.  It's that your current story isn't being told. Prospects see your old narrative, not your new reality.  Investors see your past struggles, not your present success.  Potential partners see who you were, not who you are. Your reputation management can't be set-and-forget. It needs to evolve with your journey. Start creating fresh content that reflects your current position.  Share recent wins, insights, and lessons learned.  Update your profiles to match your present reality.  Get featured in articles about your actual success. And that's how you can make sure when people search for you, They find the founder you are today, not the one you were three years ago. Because your future opportunities depend on it.

Here’s why someone who fails on integrity can never fully repair the damage to their reputation: 1. Integrity is binary — once broken, it’s gone. People can forgive mistakes in judgment, competence, or performance. But integrity isn’t a skill — it’s character. Once someone crosses that line (lying, deceiving, manipulating, or betraying trust), others no longer see a “mistake”; they see who that person really is. And character, once exposed as flawed, can’t simply be rebranded. 2. Trust is slow to build and instant to lose. Reputation runs on trust — and trust is built through consistent alignment between words and actions over time. A single act of dishonesty undoes years of consistency because it forces others to question every past and future action. “If they lied once, when else did they lie?” is a question that never leaves people’s minds. 3. Integrity failure rewrites your story. A person’s reputation is their story told by others. When integrity fails, the entire narrative changes — from “someone you can count on” to “someone who will look after themselves first.” Once that version circulates, even genuine attempts to rebuild are seen through a lens of suspicion or self-interest. 4. Apologies rarely fix moral breaches. An apology or admission can repair unintentional harm, but breaches of integrity are intentional acts. The choice to deceive or act dishonestly signals that values are negotiable — and people instinctively know that values once traded can be traded again. The words “I’ve changed” are never enough. 5. Integrity failure creates permanent doubt. Even if someone reforms, the shadow of the betrayal remains. The doubt never disappears entirely. When the next high-stakes situation arrives, people wonder, Will they do it again? That whisper of uncertainty is enough to end the benefit of the doubt — and with it, real trust. 6. In leadership, integrity is the foundation of legitimacy. A leader without integrity can’t inspire genuine loyalty, only compliance or fear. Once people believe a leader’s motives are self-serving or dishonest, no strategy, speech, or result can rebuild the moral authority that true leadership depends on. 7. The paradox of reputation: You can lose integrity only once, but you’ll be judged by it forever. #Integrity #Leadership

Reputation is like a coconut tree. Slow to grow, yet falls to the ground quickly. Reputation and trustworthiness is the basis of leadership, no matter the job. It is built over many years, one word at a time, one action at a time, one deed at a time. In leadership, few things matter more. Your reputation is among your most treasured and powerful assets. It is your currency, and it’s at the foundation of how we distinguish ourselves. Our reputation is ours, very personal but also very easy to lose or damage. What is yours? And how do you cultivate and grow your coconut reputation tree? Recently, I was reminded—yet again—just how challenging it can be to build a positive reputation. In our case, a competitor deliberately misrepresented Luminary to a client, in a ham fisted attempt to damage our standing so that it benefit their own. It was frustrating to know that any attempt to defend ourselves would only escalate the situation, so in this case, we needed to "cop it on the chin." We didn’t deviate from our course. In fact, this knowledge inspired us to double down on delivering exceptional service. I am pleased to say that our actions and character spoke for themselves, with our client kicking the competitor to the kerb. I was a little surprised, why did you do that I asked? “Actions speak louder than words. And your results are all we need,” came the response from our client. Reputations are painstakingly built but can be lost in an instant. So, how do you go about strengthening or improving yours? Unfortunately, there’s no shortcut. Reputation-building is a long game that requires consistent effort and authenticity over time. Here are some things I consider when it comes to reputation: (1) Assess your reputation: Understand how others perceive you. Seek feedback from trusted colleagues, mentors, or friends. (2) Define your values: Clarify the principles and values that guide your behaviour and decisions. (3) Build meaningful relationships: Strong networks built on trust are invaluable for reputation-building. (4) Develop your expertise: Stay ahead by continuously refining your skills and knowledge. (5) Deliver results: Always strive for excellence in your work. (6) Seek feedback and grow from it: Embrace constructive criticism as an opportunity to improve. (7) Communicate positively: Avoid gossip or negativity and focus on being known for discretion and professionalism. (8) Pay it forward: Contribute without expecting anything in return. (9) Act with integrity: Be honest, transparent, and ethical. Follow through on commitments, own your mistakes, and treat others with respect. Finally, remember this: You can’t fake being trustworthy or reliable if you are neither. Mistakes will happen, but they don’t have to define you. Building a reputation is a long-term process that requires patience, consistency, and authenticity. Like a coconut tree, reputations grow slowly yet like a coconut can fall to the ground quickly.

The first 90 days of your contract will define the next 5 years A few years ago, I worked on an FM contract that was plagued by trust issues. The relationship between client and provider had completely broken down. Not because of recent performance problems. But, because of what happened during mobilisation several years earlier. The provider had told the client everything was green. Performance was excellent. No problems whatsoever. Meanwhile, the client could see services failing, staff confused, and basic processes not working. That disconnect between what was being reported and reality created a trust deficit that never recovered. Years later, the client still viewed every provider update with suspicion. Every monthly report got scrutinised. Every assurance got questioned. Corporate memory is long, and it's unforgiving. Here's what I learned: customers expect problems at the start. They're prepared for teething issues, staffing challenges, and process hiccups. What they can't tolerate is being lied to about it. If your cleaning standards are patchy in week three, say so. If your new staff need more training, admit it. If your systems aren't talking to each other properly, flag it early. Then explain what you're doing to fix it and by when. Transparency during mobilisation builds trust. Denial destroys it. The irony is that most providers think they're protecting the relationship by downplaying problems. In reality, they're poisoning it. Corporate systems resist change once they're established. If your client forms the view that you're unreliable or untrustworthy early on, that perception becomes embedded. And changing that perception later? Nearly impossible. Get mobilisation right. Your reputation for the entire contract depends on those first few months. What's your experience? Have you seen relationships recover from a poor start, or does first impression really matter that much?

One of the downsides of growing? People don’t always notice. You level up. You take on more. You lead differently. But they still see you as who you used to be. That’s called reputation lag; when your evolution outpaces their perception. I was talking to a colleague who’s clearly stepped into a higher gear. Leading strategy. Driving outcomes. Owning the room. And still, he said: “They treat me like I never left the old role.” It’s frustrating. But it’s also part of the process. You’ve grown. Their view of you just hasn’t caught up yet. So don’t shrink to fit their memory. Don’t wait for permission to lead at your level. Keep showing up as who you’ve become. Because when the room finally catches up, you’ll already be ten steps ahead. Growth doesn’t need recognition to be real. It just needs consistency.

Reputations, like cultures, are shaped by their lowest moments. People underestimate what it takes to change a reputation. 10x that if we’re talking about a team’s reputation. This happens for a few reasons: 🔁 The reputation has formed slowly over time. 🔁 Behaviors and ways of working have been built around the reputation. 🔁 The reputation now works for the rest of the business. What can you do? ✔️ Name the reputation. ✔️ Talk to people. Listen deeply. ✔️ Be explicit about how you want it to change. ✔️Get clear on the shifts to make and gaps to fill. ✔️Find small ways to create value and make an impact. ✔️ Continuously listen to those around you and pull for feedback. Reputations, like culture, don’t change overnight. They need very deliberate time, energy, and attention.