Strategies For Successful Client Mediation

Yesterday I was on a call and a dispute over a SOC 2 audit finding got borderline unprofessional. The crux of the issue wasn't the audit finding itself (both parties actually agreed with the basic facts), but rather how the conversation went down. And after 2000+ engagements here are a few tools to handle conflicts like these. 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗩𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 Consultant: Explains audit finding. Client: I agree, but it is so low risk we should just call it an opportunity for improvement (OFI) and not include it in the formal report. Consultant: I agree it's low risk, but it is an exception from the control, so I have to include it in the report. Client: Further defends why it's low risk. Consultant: Goes on to explain 5 ways client could have avoided the issue. Client (Voice Raised): Are you willing to fight me on this? Consultant (Intensity matched): Yes. 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗜𝗧 𝗪𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗕𝗔𝗗 1. Because a challenge was issued (and accepted) it didn't leave either party much room to save face. That never turns out well. 2. In fairness to the auditor, this was a pretty cut and dry finding. In fairness to the client, it was not socialized in advance and caught a lot of people off guard. 3. This was a routine meeting for the auditor, but the client felt like it was career ending. 𝗖𝗢𝗔𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚 It is worth saying that this conversation was between two decent and competent people who would otherwise get along great. Yet, this is a situation that happens all the time with security, audit, and GRC pros. There's just a lot of conflict to navigate in this career and we have to learn to do it. So, here are a few tools I've seen work to find resolution and avoid escalating: 𝟭. 𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻'𝘀 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 - Do both parties agree on the facts? - Do both parties understand the options (eg. Change control language, add a management response)? - Are there hidden factors (eg someone's job or reputation on the line)? Seek first to understand. Always. 𝟮. 𝗚𝗲𝘁 𝗮 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝘃𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲𝗱 Sometimes a trusted third party will see things more clearly, or at least have a voice both parties respect. Try saying something like: "I can see this is important to both of us, let's pull in Christian and see if he can add some perspective that helps. Is that ok with you?" 𝟯. 𝗦𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘁 Create some space to cool off. Try saying: "This is too important for me to answer on the fly. I really need some time to think on this one. Would it be okay if I sleep on it and give you a detailed response tomorrow?" 𝟰. 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 If someone starts to get emotional or lobs a verbal punch your way - just remind yourself there's probably something going on in their life you don't see. A bad day. A personal issue. Who knows. I often use that as a mental trick to summon a little more patience. --- Good luck out there!

One of the trickiest parts of RevOps isn’t a system or a process. It’s navigating when two stakeholders want two completely different things and both think theirs is the top priority. You become the referee, the air traffic controller, and the peacemaker all in one. Here’s our go-to approach for managing conflicting requirements: 🔶 Listen first — Meet 1:1, dig into their goals, pain points, and definitions of success. Most people just want to be heard & valued (good life advice) 🔶 Find the overlaps — Even clashing priorities usually share common ground. 🔶 Bring the data — Facts cut through opinion and emotion. 🔶 Prioritize transparently — Use effort vs. impact to decide what happens now vs. later. 🔶 Set guardrails — Define non-negotiables and keep everyone in their lane. 🔶 Document everything — No “but I thought we agreed” moments. The best RevOps leaders aren’t just process builders. They’re trusted, neutral decision-makers who get everyone moving toward the same goal — even when the starting points are miles apart.

Handling conflict as a leader isn't always easy, but it is necessary to address immediately. The stakes are often high, and emotions can run even higher. Here are some mistakes I've seen made in conflict mediation, and trust me, I’ve had to learn some of these lessons the hard way. Firstly, taking sides is a big mistake. It may be natural to sympathize with one party, especially if they're more articulate or if their story hits first. But appearing biased can torpedo the mediation process. It's crucial to maintain neutrality, or you risk losing the trust of one or both parties. I've seen it happen, and it's not pretty. The key is to be empathetic but impartial. Listen carefully to both sides and withhold judgment. Secondly, not listening to understand but to respond. It’s easy to want to jump in with a solution when you hear the first piece of a problem. But doing so can rob the parties involved of the chance to fully express themselves. If people don't feel heard, they're less likely to participate constructively. You have to let everyone get their entire perspective out on the table. Often, I ask probing questions to make sure I'm not missing any underlying issues. The goal is to make everyone feel heard and understood. Another mistake is rushing towards a solution. It might be tempting to quickly put an end to the conflict and move on, but this usually means imposing your solution. The best resolutions are those that the conflicting parties arrive at themselves, which takes time. I encourage open dialogue and guide the conversation towards mutual agreement, instead of imposing my idea of what’s right. This means asking open-ended questions and facilitating, rather than dictating, the discussion. Failure to set ground rules is another setback. At the start, I always lay down some basics. No interrupting, no name-calling and so on. Everyone needs to know the boundaries and expectations to keep things respectful and productive. Lastly, forgetting to follow up is a big mistake. After you've reached a resolution, it’s important to check back in with both parties after a certain period. This shows you're committed to a long-term solution, not just putting out fires. Also, keep in mind that sometimes people just need to vent... before going into full blown problem-solving mode. When I get conflict mediation right, it’s incredibly rewarding. Teams come out stronger, individuals feel heard, and as a leader, I’ve helped foster a more positive work environment. It’s not just about solving a problem... it's about setting a standard for how conflicts should be resolved moving forward. I hope everyone has a Safe, Positive and Productive Day!