Tips for Addressing Challenges in 1:1 Meetings

“My teammate is a reserved person, and I find it challenging to get them to open up during our one-on-one meetings. Whether they're uncomfortable discussing certain topics or simply prefer to keep things brief, I want to create a more meaningful connection and draw out their thoughts.” A typical situation which happens quite a lot during the career of every manager. Hopefully, there are effective tips and tricks that can help me overcome this common situation and make our one-on-one meetings more productive and insightful. 🤔💡" 🔵 Avoid the Yes/No Trap: Instead of asking questions with one-word answers, opt for open-ended inquiries that encourage more elaborate responses. For instance, replace "Did you complete the project?" with "Tell me about your progress on the project and any roadblocks you've encountered." 🔵 Start with Neutral Topics: Kick off the conversation with light and non-threatening topics to build rapport. Casual questions like "How was your weekend?" or "What are your hobbies outside of work?" can set a relaxed tone and gradually lead to deeper discussions. 🔵 Show Empathy and Patience: Recognize that some individuals take time to open up. Demonstrate genuine empathy and patience during the conversation, reassuring them that their perspectives are valued. 🔵 Listen Actively: Active listening is a superpower! 🦸♂️ Be fully present during the conversation, maintain eye contact, and nod in acknowledgment to show that you're genuinely interested in what they have to say. 🔵 Use "What" and "How" Questions: Employ questions like "What challenges are you facing in your current project?" or "How do you feel about your role in the team?" These encourage detailed responses and deeper insights. 🔵 Allow Silence: Don't be afraid of silence during the conversation. Give your direct report space to collect their thoughts and respond in their own time. 🔵 Be Supportive: Ensure your team members know that you're there to help and support them. Show appreciation for their efforts and celebrate their achievements, fostering a positive and trusting atmosphere. 🔵 Reflect and Summarize: Throughout the conversation, paraphrase their responses and summarize key points to show that you're actively engaged and value their input. 🔵 End with Encouragement: Conclude the meeting by thanking them for their honesty and contributions. Express your commitment to their growth and well-being within the organization. By incorporating these strategies, you'll create a safe and empowering space for your quieter direct reports to thrive and shine! 💪 Remember, understanding and supporting our team members is a continuous journey that enriches both their professional development and your leadership skills. #LeadershipSkills #OneonOneMeetings #OpenEndedQuestions #CommunicationTips #EmployeeEngagement #TeamBuilding 🚀🤝

When I do 1:1s with my reports, I explicitly tell them, “No status updates”. We have emails, slack channels, and team meetings (ideally as the pre-read, not the meeting itself) for status updates. Our 1:1 is for you. At all times, I’ve got a mental model of how you are doing in each of the PM competency areas* . I know what types of projects I can steer or delegate to you, either because it’s a strength of yours or because it’s something to get better at. I also know (because I’ve asked you!) what your career goals are, so I can fold that into our conversations and opportunities. I also have a 1:1 agenda doc that we both have access to. Throughout the week, either of us can pop in there and add a keyword or phrase to the doc, to remind ourselves of the thing to talk about. Our agenda topics usually fall into these categories: 1. Relationship and trust building — what makes you tick, what feels rewarding, what is scary, and why? My goal, in addition to getting to know you better, is to create a psychologically safe environment that allows you to be vulnerable so that you actually tell me this stuff, tell me bad news when you learn it, and ask for help. 2. Coaching and reinforcement — what happened in the last week that showcased a theme we’ve been working on? What was a time when you did something awesome (or at least, better) that we want to celebrate*? 3. “How can I help?” — you want my help solving some problem, or have some question in search of an answer. Or maybe the reverse: I’ve noticed a problem that I want you to solve (or, I have something that I want your help solving), or I have a question that you may be able to answer. But before all of that, I’m opening with “How are you?” Sometimes, your answer makes clear that we’re going to do none of our agenda because of Feelings* . You’re pissed that other people are getting in the way, you’re anxious about the latest layoff rumor, you’re scared after a meeting with Exec that went poorly. I’m listening, asking questions, engaging, validating your feelings*. I will make a snap call — are you open to problem solving the situation in this meeting, or should we come back to it another time? Emotional attunement (with boundaries!) is the answer, once again. (Thank you, Dan Storms, for requesting this topic!) —————— *If you’re interested in reading the footnotes as well as my work-in-progress thoughts (today: why are so many managers bad at managing?), sign up for my free newsletter: https://lnkd.in/g44P3_rB

“How do I make my 1:1 meetings more effective? I’m not sure they’re all that useful, frankly…” If you’re like most leaders, especially for #techleaders, this may resonate with you. You know you’re *supposed* to hold 1:1 meetings with your direct reports (perhaps as Andy Grove in "High Output Management" prescribes), but you find that these 1:1 meetings can vary in quality... You ask, “Anything I can help with?” and your direct report says “Nope, all good." Then the meeting ends. (And then of course, you do conveniently find out weeks later they needed help with something that has snowballed into a much bigger problem 😂) To try to catch issues more proactively and better support your team as a leader, here are a few tips for increasing the efficacy of 1:1 #meetings with your team: 1:1 meetings only have the degree of purpose you intend for them to have. In other words, if you've been viewing these meetings as "catching up" or "checking in," the outcomes of your meeting will be as vague as that description. As a result, to ensure greater efficacy of your 1:1s, you'll want to laser-in on using these 1:1 meetings for 3 specific purposes: 1️⃣ Uncovering issues 2️⃣ Building rapport and organizational alignment 3️⃣ Gaining greater visibility and new ideas that can help grow and further the team / organization To fulfill these 1 - 3 of these purposes, you’ll want to do the following: 💫 Focus on asking questions that give you insights to your functional area. For example, if you’re a Head of Product or Product Manager, you could ask... - Any learnings from your own day-to-day work that impacts the product? - Any insights from customer interactions or your own usage of the product? - Any ideas, suggestions, or concerns with the product roadmap, etc? - What opportunities do we have to improve the product? - Is it clear how your day-to-day work contributes to the product's success and overall company's success? - Is it clear what direction the product is headed, and why we're making certain decisions about the product? 💫 Use the time as rare opportunity to gage morale, understand what issues they might have, and so then you can circle back with your supervisor/leadership team to gain a more complete picture of how your team is doing. For example, you can ask questions such as:  - How is your energy level these days? - How clear is the overall direction of the company? - How is the working dynamic in the team? - What are things you see opportunities for improvement for myself as a leader? Compare this methodology to only asking, “How can I help?” or “How’s it going?”... See the difference? Try focusing in on the intentionality of these 1:1 meetings around these 3 purposes, try using some of these specific questions... You may be pleasantly surprised by how the quality of your 1:1 meetings and your overall #teamperformance improves. P.S.: I’ll link to more resources on 1:1s in the comments below, if helpful!

Let me fix your 1:1 meetings in 90 seconds. It only requires two changes: - Make it their meeting, not yours - Ask questions, don't give directions Here's how to do it: 1. Make It Their Meeting Relinquishing ownership of this meeting is the same as delegating any other work. - Define what excellent looks like - Hold them accountable - Coach to success - Don't step in But how do I get what I need to lead? That's part 2... 2. Good Questions >> Great Directions The easiest way to align on expectations is to preview the questions you want them to answer. If they can answer these well, you can have confidence that they are excellently managing their area (even individual contributors). Here are mine: ✅ How are you doing? Want people to produce outsized results? You need to care personally. You'll only know when to show up for them if you know them well. Get a tepid response? Ask again. ✅ What's most important for us to focus on? If it is their meeting, they set the agenda. Not only are you empowering them, but you also get to learn how they think. This will help you anticipate what they might miss. ✅ How are you tracking against your goals? I want data. Clear metrics. The more tangible, the better. If the goal isn't easily measured, then I want a few qualitative angles that are in tension to surface the truth. Don't be afraid to ask, "What is your confidence?" ✅ Are there notable Wins/Losses to discuss? The specific Win or Loss doesn't matter to me as much as: a) Can they separate big from small? b) Are they proactively sharing? My probing questions should uncover very little. ✅ What problems are you focused on solving? I don't expect perfection if we're driving hard and creating value. Instead, I want them to have command of their area. - Do they know the problems? - Do the solutions make sense? - Are they making good progress? ✅ How are your people doing? Your people are only as good as those that support them. Even individual contributors rely on others. Help them practice sizing up those around them. Make empathy a habit. ✅ How are you getting better? When your team is filled with curious and compounding professionals, the result is a team that's agile and resilient. To get there, you must coach those who coach others. ✅ How can I support your success? Hopefully, you've done this throughout the conversation, but it never hurts to ask them directly, "What else do you need to win?" - Remove obstacles. - Provide resources. - Repeat often. If you want access to the management dashboard template I used to delegate my 1:1 meetings, subscribe to my MGMT Playbook for free access. https://lnkd.in/eAA-CJrJ You get dozens of playbooks and templates for critical management moments. It's the advice your boss should be giving you but probably isn't. P.S. Repost to share this with your network ♻️. And follow Dave Kline for more great posts.