Direct vs softened language in workplace emails

Growing up in Indonesia, we rarely heard feedback that direct. Most criticism came wrapped in diplomatic language and context 😅. So when I had my first performance review with an American manager, I wasn't prepared for what came next. He said: "Your presentation was confusing and you didn't answer the main question. It could have been much better. This needs to improve immediately." I went home that night replaying every word, wondering if I was about to get fired. Recently, I discovered Erin Meyer's "Culture Map" and her concept of The Disagreement Scale. Most people know her for identifying low-context vs high-context cultures, but this framework about confrontation changed how I think about leadership. On one end are cultures that welcome direct confrontation when in disagreement - Netherlands, Germany, France, Russia and the United States. On the other end are cultures that avoid confrontation - Indonesia, Thailand, Japan, and Korea. In confrontational cultures, you hear phrases like: - "That's wrong" - "I disagree completely" - "You performed poorly on this" In non-confrontational cultures, we use softer language: - "Maybe next time you could try..." - "I'm not sure, but perhaps..." - "That's interesting, however..." As a leader running a company with people from many cultures, this nuance matters more than you think. 💯 If you give direct feedback to someone from an indirect culture, and they shut down or become disengaged, that's on you as the leader. You're not getting the most out of them because you haven't adapted your style. Sure, you can demand everyone conform to your management approach. But then you must be very selective about who you hire. You'll miss out on incredible talent simply because of communication preferences. I've learned to code-switch. With my prospects and clients, I'm direct about problems. With my Indonesian and Vietnamese team members, I layer in more context and softer language. Same message, different delivery. The goal isn't to change who people are, it's to communicate in a way they can actually hear and act on. What's your experience with this? Have you ever given feedback that landed completely wrong because of cultural differences? Or received criticism that felt way harsher than intended? #Leadership #Management #GlobalTeams #CultureMap #Indonesia

I stopped softening my words to make other people comfortable. I used to fill my emails with words that made me sound “nice"..."polite". Especially as a woman. Especially early in my career. Especially when I wanted to be liked, more than I wanted to be heard. But confidence doesn’t come from sounding nice. It comes from speaking clearly. Directly. Without shrinking your words to make others comfortable. So I made these 5 small (but conscious) edits: ✅ “Just” → [delete] Instead of: “I just wanted to check in…” Say: “I’m checking in on…” → Your message becomes direct, confident, and more respectful of everyone’s time. ✅ “I apologize” or “Sorry” → “Thank you” Instead of: “Sorry for the delay.” Say: “Thank you for your patience.” → You own the moment without diminishing yourself. ✅ “I think/feel/believe” → Speak the fact. Instead of: “I think we should…” Say: “We should…” → You stand in your expertise instead of tiptoeing around it. ✅ “Hopefully” → Be definitive. Instead of: “Hopefully we can connect next week.” Say: “Let’s connect next week.” → You sound decisive and committed. ✅ “Does that make sense?” → Invite dialogue, not doubt. Instead of: “Does that make sense?” Say: “I’d love your thoughts.” → You create collaboration without questioning your clarity. Small edits. Big difference. Because your words matter. And so does how you deliver them.

🚫 “Sorry to bother you…” 🚫 “This might be a silly idea…” 🚫 “I’ll try my best…” We use phrases like these every day in emails, presentations, and meetings. They sound polite, but they quietly shrink our authority. Here’s the problem: Language doesn’t just transfer information. It shapes perception. The words you choose can either reinforce credibility or chip away at it. ✨ Try this instead: 🌸 “I have a question about…” (direct, respectful, clear) 🌸 “Here’s what I recommend…” (ownership, not hesitation) 🌸 “I will make sure this is delivered by…” (commitment, not uncertainty) Notice the shift? These aren’t cosmetic swaps. They’re mindset swaps. Each change signals something about you: confidence, clarity, leadership. Professionals often assume communication is about more words. In reality, it’s about better words. As a coach, I’ve seen careers shift simply because someone swapped “I think” for “I recommend.” The message was the same. The perception was not. Because in business, people don’t just hear what you say, they hear who you are through what you say. What’s one phrase you’ve eliminated from your professional vocabulary that made a difference? #Communication #Leadership #ProfessionalGrowth #WorkplaceSkills #RidhiSaluja #Language

PSA: Stop saying “sorry” so much in the workspace! 🚨 I used to cushion every ask, every email, every meeting with apologies. As a female founder, I felt like I needed to try to come across as less demanding in order to be likable. I didn’t want to be “rude” or “bossy.” It turns out… Qualifying my words was undermining my confidence and authority as a leader. The truth is: Clear, direct communication isn’t rude. It’s respectful. It saves time. And it builds trust. ❌ “Sorry, I don’t want to take too much of your time.” ✅ “I’ll keep this brief and get straight to the key points.” ❌ “Sorry if I missed your email.” ✅ “Thanks for your patience. I’m catching up on your email now.” ❌ “Sorry, can I add something real quick?” ✅ “I’d like to add a point before we move on.” We’re not bossy… we’re bosses. 💪🏻 What’s a phrase you’re cutting from your vocabulary this year?