How to Influence and Guide with Confidence

How to speak up when it feels safer not to. 10 ways to challenge with respect. You’ve been in this meeting. A senior team gathers to discuss a big decision. Someone says something that doesn’t sit right. Everyone notices. Everyone hesitates. And then... silence. Because speaking up feels risky. But staying silent? That costs even more. After decades in these rooms, here’s what I’ve learned: 1) If you don’t speak up, people assume you agree. → Silence doesn’t protect you—it defines you. → Say: “I see it differently—can I explain why?” 2) Being first is uncomfortable. → But it opens the door for others to follow. → Ask: “Is anyone else thinking about it differently?” 3) You teach people how to treat you. → Every “sure” tells them their idea is fine. → Try: “I don’t love that direction—here’s why.” 4) Disagreeing isn’t disrespectful. → Tone matters more than opinion. → Say: “Would it be okay if I offered a pushback?” 5) Fake harmony blocks real solutions. → If no one disagrees, nothing gets better. → Try: “I wonder what we’re not saying yet?” 6) Credibility builds real influence. → People listen to who earns their respect. → Build it by asking smart questions. 7) Silence sends a message, even if you didn’t mean to. → People assume you're on board. → Say: “I have another take -- can I share it?” 8) You don’t need everyone to agree. → But you do need to speak clearly. → Say what you mean in one sentence, then pause. 9) You don’t need a title to lead. → Trust is built by what you do, not what you have. → Be the steady voice people rely on when it counts. 10) People remember who spoke when they couldn’t. → Your voice might be the one they needed. → That’s leadership. 💬 If you don’t say it, no one will. ✅ Speak with purpose. ✅ Challenge with respect. ✅ Lead with credibility, not just a title. You don’t have to take over the room. You just have to move it forward. What’s one phrase or approach you use to challenge with respect? Please share 👇 ______________________ ♻ Repost to remind someone that quiet isn’t always safe. 👉Follow Stephanie Eidelman (Meisel) for more ways to grow your visibility and influence at work. 📫 Subscribe to my free newsletter, The Career Edit, for tools to lead with confidence: https://hubs.la/Q03dY9_n0

There's a huge misconception about leadership, and it holds managers (and their teams) back from reaching their full potential... Leadership isn't a position title - and it's not about using your authority to get things done, either... it's about your ability to inspire and guide others - and the key ingredient is influence But influence can be a tricky skill to nail down - especially if you've never been mentored or trained on it.... Here's a framework to help you navigate the nuances of influencing people effectively: 1️⃣ Establish Clear Objectives: Before attempting to influence, define your goals - What do you aim to achieve? Clarity provides a roadmap for your influence strategy 2️⃣ Know Your Stakeholders: Identify key individuals or groups who play a role in your objectives Understand their perspectives, motivations, and concerns - then tailor your approach accordingly 3️⃣ Craft Compelling Narratives: Weave a story that aligns with your objectives Compelling narrative engage emotions and resonate with your audience, making your influence more potent 4️⃣ Emphasize Shared Values: Find common ground by highlighting shared value - so that you can foster a sense of connection and makes your influence more relatable and persuasive 5️⃣ Listen Actively: Effective influence is a two-way street Actively listen to the concerns and ideas of others, and acknowledge their perspectives to build trust and credibility 6️⃣ Provide Solutions, Not Just Problems: Frame your proposals in a solution-oriented manner Leaders who offer actionable solutions gain respect and influence decisions more effectively 7️⃣ Leverage Social Proof: Showcase success stories or examples where your proposed ideas have worked elsewhere Social proof builds confidence in your ability to deliver results 8️⃣ Adaptability is Key: Be flexible in your approach, because every situation isn't the same Adaptability allows you to navigate diverse scenarios with finesse 9️⃣ Build Relationships Authentically: Authentic connections form the foundation of lasting influence Invest time in building relationships based on trust and mutual respect Remember... Influence is not about manipulation - it's about understanding, motivating, and inspiring others through shared values and goals Embrace this framework to elevate your leadership influence! Do you have any more tips on influence? #Leadership #Management

They call it "soft skills" to make you ignore it. But EQ is your hardest competitive edge. For years, I wondered why my input wasn't valued the same way others' was. Same credentials. Same experience. Different results. Then I realized: I was focused on being impressive instead of being influential. Here's what (actually) builds influence at work 💡 1) Ask what they need before offering what you know ↳ "What's your biggest concern about this?" then tailor your response 2) Create psychological safety before delivering tough news ↳ "I'm bringing this up because I respect our partnership" 3) Use silence as your secret weapon ↳ After making your point, stop talking. Let it land. 4) Address the unspoken concern first ↳ "I know some might think this is too aggressive, but here's why..." 5) Frame feedback as curiosity, not criticism ↳ "I'm curious about your experience with..." 6) Make your boundaries feel like respect, not rejection ↳ "To give this the attention it deserves, I'll need until Friday" 7) End difficult conversations with clarity, not comfort ↳ "Here's what I heard... here's what happens next" Your expertise gets you invited to conversations. Your emotional intelligence makes people listen. Which shift will you try today? -- ♻️ Repost to help your network build influence that lasts 🔔 Follow Dr. Carolyn Frost for EQ strategies that create real impact

Parents, if you want to help your kids be more effective communicators, or give that graduation speech with confidence - give them this advice!! I was in the gym yesterday and overheard a patron talking to another about how nervous his son was because he was giving the graduation speech. His dad - I presume - said to the other guy in the gym with us *jokingly* "I told him, well, you got one chance to do it right! And it's how you will be remembered forever!" I wanted to jump in and say, 'Listen, I have three easy techniques he can use to give that speech with confidence!" I didn't, and I should have. So, I feel compelled today to write a post about those three techniques that you can pass on to your kids if they are about to give a graduation speech! Or any other important conversation. Here they are: 📝 1. Script it and then practice it - every day! However, you DO NOT want to read this on the big day. So here is how you can practice. Start by writing it word for word. Then read it out loud a few times. Then try to memorize parts of it - so look around the room, not at the paper. Once you master that, turn that script into bullet points, or talking points. Now practice it again out loud. Remember to look at people! Talk to them, read to them. This is why you do not want to bring a word-for-word script up to that podium. You want the conversation to flex, not be rigid. Bring some humor—if appropriate—and your personality to your speech. Excite people, don't bore them. AND MOVE around when you practice! Do not be a robot. That brings me to the second piece of advice. 🙌 2. MOVE. People move their arms, head, hands, and upper body when they speak. Sometimes the lower body too - just don't be a dancer. Stay grounded. Keep your body poster open! Do not ball up by tucking your arms close to your sides or keeping your feet together. Your feet should be 10-12 inches apart. Basically, take a Superman or Wonder Woman pose because that pose will keep your stress hormones suppressed. You will feel and look confident! And confidence is attractive. (If you have ever been told not to talk with your hands, you have been given some really bad advice.) And finally... 📣 3. Right before you take the stage, think these thoughts: "I have a great speech, and people will love it. I will entertain them. I am not worried at all because I am going to enjoy sharing my knowledge and message. I am excited to be able to do this!" And those thoughts will generate a calm, charismatic, and confident behavior. Now go forth and conquer that graduation speech!!! 👏 🙌 👊

You may have the best idea, backed by solid data, yet no one seems to listen. It does not necessarily mean that you should leave. Instead, try working on your influencing skills. See, with more teams working remotely and across different geographies, it is easy for your work and your contributions to get lost. And, the 2 things that will help you avoid this are personal branding and influencing skills. My focus today is on influencing skills. [Drop me a note if you would like me to do the same for personal branding.] Having great influencing skills allows you to: > Lead people and projects without necessarily having a big title > Easily get along with people from any part of an organization > Get your ideas and suggestions considered when making any major decision. Long story short, they make your life easier. Here are 5 steps to improve them: 1️⃣ - Know your stuff There is no shortcut to being good at what you do. 2️⃣ - Know the business Understand how things work internally and how external factors impact the company. 3️⃣ - Connect and communicate effectively The goal is for people to know you and what you bring to the table, and for you to understand their realities. 4️⃣ - Demonstrate your value The more you make people's lives easier, the more valuable your viewpoint becomes 5️⃣ - Showcase your impact Your work won’t speak for itself, especially when you work with people remotely. Speak up 📢 Influence is built on credibility and trust. As you follow these steps, your recommendations will eventually carry more weight. Mind sharing your experience or more tips?

If you're looking to grow your communication confidence, the best thing to do is the next, small thing. I recently spoke to a young professional woman who'd recently joined a new team. She's excited about the opportunity to play a bigger role and make a greater impact. But she's struggling to find ways to speak up and contribute. Confidence comes from competence. You grow your confidence when you get your reps in. Small steps lead to bigger ones. But where to start? We brainstormed ways she can begin speaking up and participating in team discussions. ✨ Ask a question ✨ It's easy to ask a clarifying question in follow-up to what someone else has shared. Clarity helps everyone. And asking a question shows interest and engagement. ✨ Yes, and... ✨ Lean into and build upon what another person has said. Use the improv tool of "yes, and..." to flesh out or add to another team member's input. ✨ Give a compliment ✨ Share genuine, positive feedback on someone else's thoughts or presentation. Everyone appreciates a compliment. And being a team member who encourages and builds up others reflects positively on you as well. None of these are enormous displays of your brilliance. They're not designed for that. They're designed to break the ice that's holding your voice hostage. To give you baby steps to speak up. Baby steps always lead to bigger opportunities to share the brilliance inside you. You've got this, sister. Go get em!

Many women struggle with self-doubt and a lack of confidence. There’s one thing in particular I get my clients to do to overcome this.👇🏻 Practice. The more you practice, the more certain you’re going to be about what to say in certain situations. This applies to speeches, sales pitches, one-on-ones with your team, and so much more. I encourage all of my clients to: Go over narratives in their heads.  Think about what they mean.  Unpack every conversational element. For example, let’s say that you’re pitching a product and the customer keeps coming up with objection after objection. If you’ve gone over every element in your head and taken the time to practice your narrative, you’ll be able to pull that out when you need it. Practicing your narrative with a friend, another employee, a pet, or even just recording yourself and viewing it later is also highly effective. The more you practice, the better! Similarly, when it comes to speeches, I encourage my clients to memorize their transitions - not the speech. Ideally, they should know their content so well that they can riff at any point. They shouldn’t be reliant on their notes, which often just create anxiety. Ultimately, practice creates confidence within yourself because you trust that you can tackle whatever situation may arise! #LeadLikeAWoman #OwnYourStage

When attempting to influence others, we often start with our understanding of a problem and believe we have the best solution. So, we think influencing simply means getting people on board with what we want to do. However, in these discussions, the first thing you’ll notice is that everyone sees the problem differently than you. And that lack of alignment is why we fail to truly influence. Before proposing any solutions, we first need to develop a shared understanding of exactly what problem we’re trying to solve. A top-down approach to imposing your view may be necessary at times but it’s not a real influence. To genuinely influence someone, you must solve the problem as they see it. Only once there is alignment on defining the problem can you have an authentic discussion about potential solutions. People will be much more receptive to your ideas if they feel you grasp where they are coming from in the first place. Start by stepping into the other person's shoes instead of insisting they try on yours. True influence comes from meeting people where they stand, not demanding they stand where you are. #LeaderCircle #LeaderCircle911 #Leadership #LeadershipExcellence #LeadershipPrinciples #Influence #InfluenceStrategies #PerspectiveShift #perspectives