Simple Ways To Connect With An Audience

I've been pretty quiet online since my father's death at the start of the month. The grief that moved through me the first 48 hours after his passing rocked my nervous system to its core. But then, spending the next few days preparing a speech for my father’s memorial service—that felt like a building with a foundation made of quicksand trying to survive a magnitude 10.0 earthquake. I’ve spoken at multiple Fortune 10 companies, at prestigious conferences, and even at the United Nations, but speaking at my father’s funeral I knew would be unlike anything I had done before. On my left was my deceased father, in a casket. And in front of me, while I spoke, was a row of immediate family members whom I hadn’t spoken to in over a decade. Here’s what I know with absolute certainty two weeks later. Words sever relationships. And heal them. Humor makes the unimaginable survivable. Being in our bodies as we feel and, at times, communicate hard things—it’s a superpower. One that is absolutely worth developing. While summarizing the impact my dad had on my life in 3 minutes was close to impossible, those 3 minutes changed me. They profoundly changed important relationships that had gone dormant for far too long. And… deepened my appreciation for the magic and miracles that a presentation can produce. As someone who strives to harness learning and growth opportunities from anything and everything, which now also includes funerals, here are 3 speaking tenets I (re)discovered and hope you will integrate into your speeches and interpersonal communication. 1. Tell stories that tickle and delight. When we elicit laughter, especially in moments others don’t expect, we can call in and connect even more than when we are earnest. And stories provide ample opportunities for this. 2. Use eye contact—especially when saying vulnerable things, like “I’m sorry.” Or accepting others’ apologies and choosing to co-create a way to move forward. When we hold or receive another’s gaze, it deepens empathy and compassion, and it can heal so much. 3. Prepare for all possible outcomes, and then surrender control. We often don’t know how a presentation, a pitch, or an apology will go. But if we visualize and hold in our bodies our desired outcome, while prepping for how we will communicate if things don’t go the way we hope, we free ourselves from the anxiety and futility of clinging tightly to control. We also amplify our energy and personal power in the process.

How you show up on camera is just as important as what you say on camera. If you feel nervous, your audience will likely feel unsettled. If you keep it real and seem comfortable, your audience will be at ease. Most of us don't love seeing ourselves on camera, but studying yourself and practicing can help you nail delivery, and that delivery matters. Here are some straightforward tips to help you connect with your audience and push past that nervous self-awareness that comes with being on camera. 1. Make eye contact with the camera, but don't overdo it. Authenticity matters, so look away occasionally—but do it intentionally. Glance to the side or down; this feels more natural and thoughtful, rather than looking up, which can come off like an eye-roll. 2. Stand tall. Keeping your back straight with your shoulders down and back shows authority. An open posture makes you appear more confident and trustworthy. 3. Breathe deeply before speaking. Nervousness can make you tense up, restricting your diaphragm and causing you to run out of breath mid-sentence. Deep breaths expand your diaphragm and steady your voice. 4. End each sentence with a downward inflection. Avoid "uptalk," which can make you sound uncertain. A steady, lower tone at the end of your sentences projects confidence. 5. Fake confidence until it's real. Even if you're feeling unsure, act like you're in control. It'll start to become second nature over time. 6. Bring in a friend to coach you. Real-time feedback from someone you trust can work wonders. They can help identify and smooth out mental blocks while giving you the encouragement you need. 7. Repetition is key. The more often you put yourself in front of the camera, the less daunting it will be. That initial discomfort will evolve into confidence that radiates on screen. What would you add to the list?

What can a baby teach us about mastering presentations? A few years ago, I recalled a memory of a friend navigating new motherhood. She had just welcomed her first baby, and her mother stayed with her for the first week to help her adjust. Despite years of experience babysitting in her teens and early twenties, my friend was understandably nervous about caring for her own infant. She asked her mother if she would stay longer. Her mother, ever calm, offered this timeless advice: “Oh, Elaine, it’s not that hard. Just keep his stomach full and his bottom dry.” Brilliant in its simplicity! The wisdom behind those words has stayed with me, because it reminds us that sometimes the best solutions are the simplest. And when it comes to public speaking, it’s the same principle: keep things clear and focused, and the rest will fall into place. Presenting doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Yet, many people get bogged down in the details—choosing the right words, worrying about how they look, fearing the “what ifs.” But let me tell you, the key to a successful presentation boils down to just two things: 1.      A clear message 2.     Audience connection If you nail these two, everything else is just gravy. The Power of a Clear Message Hone in on one core idea. If you can’t explain your message in a single sentence, you probably don’t have a clear enough grasp on it. Use short, impactful sentences that are easy for the ear to follow. A message may read brilliantly on paper, but when delivered aloud, it can easily lose its power if it’s too complex. So, speak in everyday language. Keep it conversational. People will connect with what you're saying because it feels accessible and real. Building an Authentic Connection with Your Audience Once your message is clear, focus on how it lands with your audience. Valuable content is just the starting point; you need to get your listeners out of their heads and into their hearts. So, how do you build that connection? Start by telling stories—personal anecdotes, industry-related examples, metaphors, and even humor. Stories help the audience see themselves in your message and make the content memorable. Make eye contact. Master the pause. Silence can be a powerful tool—give your audience time to feel your words, not just hear them. Engage them directly by using their names, asking them to participate with a show of hands, or encouraging them to nod in agreement. People respond when they feel like they’re part of the experience. Let them see your humanity—share your struggles and your successes—but don’t make the presentation all about you. Shift the focus to them. Make your message their journey. Just like my friend, who was initially overwhelmed by the thought of caring for her newborn, the simple, straightforward approach to presenting will give you the confidence you need to shine. With a clear message and a strong connection, you’ll deliver a knockout presentation every time.  

As a Data guy, I had certain beliefs about presenting. I feel icky admitting this, but I used to think... "Can I impress them with my charts and graphs?" If you've ever seen a data analyst present, you've seen this. Data Analysts love their charts and graphs. But the truth is... Pretty graphics don't win people over, especially Senior Leaders. My problem was... my ego. And it actually made me a ball of nerves. So why does this matter to you? Because when presenting is about YOU, it's all wrong. Being impressive isn't about great slides... being extra funny or sarcastic... or having a one line zinger... Business leaders aren't impressed by this. Here's the key that changed everything… Your Leaders want Team Members who know this: Great business presentations are about being RELEVANT for your audience. Here are 5 ways to be more RELEVANT when speaking... so you can engage your audience and win them over. (See if you see the common thread.) 1️⃣ Start with their priorities Don’t open with your outline. Start with what they care about. 2️⃣ Use their language and examples Skip buzzwords. Speak in terms they already use day-to-day. 3️⃣ Answer: what does this mean for them? After every key point, tie it to... what and why it matters to them. 4️⃣ Prioritize what impacts their world Cut anything that’s irrelevant... Oh, and don't think emotions don't matter Every leader makes decisions with some emotion. 5️⃣ Tailor your visuals and data to your audience Your examples and slides should reflect... their world, not yours. Did you see the common thread? Notice how being engaging & impressive is about THEM! Yes, great communicators know it's about the audience! Focus on SERVING them and you'll engage (and impress) them. Why? Because... Serving others reduces nerves (and your ego). Relevance to your audience earns attention. Speaking in their language builds credibility. Was there one of the 5 that stood out to you? - - - - - If we haven't met, I'm Cooper, and I help business professionals grow their confidence & credibility when speaking and presenting. +Follow me for more actionable tips.

Most people think great insights make great presentations. Researchers proved otherwise: 60–65% of all communicative meaning is conveyed nonverbally. The 8 delivery micro-behaviors that create instant authority: 1. Purposeful Leans When you lean in, you're in a "ready position." This cues people to know something important is coming." Try this right now: Lean forward slightly. Feel how your energy changes? That's what your audience feels, too. Tony Robbins does this frequently. He leans in on his most critical points, making audiences feel like they're getting insider secrets. ____ 2. Facial Expressiveness Even brilliant ideas sound dull when delivered without expression. So, let your face underline what your words say. This doesn't mean constant smiling. It means matching your expression to your message: seriousness for serious topics, excitement for exciting news. ____ 3. Dynamic Hand Gestures Nervous speakers pin their arms to their sides or hide their hands. Captivating speakers use purposeful gestures that help listeners understand. Examples: • Big idea = expansive gestures • Small problem = pinched fingers • Three points = counting on fingers • From the heart = hand on chest Why it works: Gestures reduce cognitive load for listeners AND make you more fluent as a speaker. ____ 4. Broad Body Posture Defeated people make themselves small—chin down, shoulders rolled in. Confident speakers claim their space: broad shoulders, relaxed neck, and chest open. The magic measurement: Distance between your earlobes and shoulders. The greater the distance, the more confident you appear. ____ 5. Mutual Laughter If someone laughs or smiles, join them. Mirroring positive emotion builds instant connection (and makes you more likable). ____ 6. Strategic Eye Contact No need to stare people down (that’s creepy). But land your key point while making eye contact to drive the message home and build trust. Here’s how: Look around while thinking/storytelling → deliver the final point with direct eye contact → pause for impact. ____ 7. The Eyebrow Flash Universally, raised eyebrows signal interest and curiosity. Use it when sharing insight or when listening to show curiosity and warmth. ____ 8. Make a Grand Entrance Don’t stroll in lost. Walk with purpose. Know where you’re headed. And if you’re greeting someone? Try a double-clasp handshake. It increases the connection hormone (oxytocin). Small tweaks in your delivery like these can make the difference between being ignored… or remembered.