How to Rethink Intelligence in the Workplace

Over 2,200 professionals were asked: Why do most leaders fail? Here’s how the answers broke down: 40% said low emotional intelligence (EQ) 36% said poor people skills 16% said lack of strategy 7% said lack of resilience That means more than 3 out of 4 people believe leadership failures are rooted in emotional and relational blind spots not a lack of intelligence or tactical ability. Let that sink in. There are tons of high performers, technical experts, and brilliant minds out there...but when leadership breaks down… it’s almost never about the work. It’s about the weight. The emotional weight. The relational weight. The pressure of responsibility without the internal tools to carry it well. Here’s what that tells me: If you're not developing your emotional and relational toolkit, you're building a leadership house on sand. So let’s break this down: 1. Emotional Intelligence is not a soft skill. It’s a survival skill. If you can’t regulate yourself, you can’t lead others. Your reactions will create fear instead of safety. Your stress will spread to your team like wildfire. And your leadership will become unpredictable no matter how skilled you are. 2. People skills are the foundation, not the bonus. Communication, empathy, presence… these aren’t the “nice to have” traits. They’re the thing that earns you trust and buy-in. The thing that allows you to influence without forcing. The thing that turns authority into leadership. 3. Strategy without self-awareness is a liability. How many smart leaders do you know who lost teams not because of bad plans… but because they didn’t know how to connect? How to listen? How to slow down and lead with presence? The more pressure you face, the more critical it becomes to: Slow down your reactions Name what you're feeling Lead with clarity, not emotion And make space for real connection This isn’t about perfection. It’s about self-awareness and consistency. Want to apply this today? Here are 3 simple things I recommend: 1. Practice one EQ check-in per day. Pause at noon. Ask yourself: “What’s driving how I’m showing up right now?” Then adjust if needed. That awareness compounds. 2. Schedule one conversation this week with a direct report or peer. Ask: “What’s one thing I could do that would make your job easier or more fulfilling?” Then listen without defending. 3. Reflect weekly. At the end of your week, write down 1 moment where you reacted instead of responding. What did it cost you? What can you learn? The best leaders I’ve worked with? They’re not the loudest. Not the smartest. They’re the ones who do this internal work consistently. Because leadership isn’t just about performance… It’s about presence under pressure. So here’s my question to you: What’s one relational or emotional skill you’re actively working to improve? Drop it below. Let’s get better...together. (Pic cred: Apostolos (Apo) Belokas)

EQ drives success. These 5 myths drive failure. I used to believe EQ was just "being nice." That mindset nearly derailed my executive career. Until a mentor debunked them for me. Here’s how to break free from the myths keeping you stuck: 1/ Stop Equating Emotional Intelligence with Being Emotional → EQ is about understanding emotions, not being controlled by them. → It’s means understanding and managing emotions effectively. ↳ Try this: Before reacting, ask yourself, “Is this emotion guiding me or controlling me?” 2/ Let Go of the “Born With It” Excuse → EQ is more than talent. It’s a trainable skill. → Small, daily moments shape emotional intelligence. ↳ Try this: Count to 7 before responding. 3/ Stop Thinking High EQ Means Always Being Positive → Emotional intelligence means embracing all emotions, good or bad. → Suppressing emotions leads to burnout, not resilience. ↳ Try this: When facing negativity, ask, “How can I process this in a way that serves me?” 4/Stop Thinking EQ Is Just About Empathy → Empathy is important, but it’s not the whole picture. → Mastering EQ means balancing understanding others and managing yourself. ↳ Try this: Before jumping into empathy mode, ask, “What role does self-awareness play in this moment?” 5/Stop Believing High EQ Means No Emotional Struggles → All emotionally intelligent people experience challenges. → The difference? They navigate emotions, not suppress them. ↳  Try this: Pause before reacting and ask, “What is this emotion trying to teach me?” Your impact comes from how you navigate emotions and connections. EQ isn’t a bonus. It’s your competitive edge. Small shifts = big results. Stay intentional. What’s one way you’ll strengthen your EQ today? ♻️ Share with others to debunk EQ myths today. 🔔 Follow me (@Loren) for more evidence-based leadership insights [Sources: HBR, Goleman EI Group, Yale Center for EI]

Not everything needs practice. But this does. You don’t need to practice unlocking your phone. You learn it, you got it. But in business? Emotionally intelligent communication is different. It’s a skill that requires practice under pressure. Because it’s easy to sound calm in training. Harder when a client snaps. When your team drops the ball. When someone questions your value. And here’s where wellbeing practices come in. No one communicates at their best when they’re burned out, triggered, or running on fumes. Here’s what actually takes practice in business: - Regulating your emotions before the conversation starts - Giving clear, kind, direct feedback—even when it's uncomfortable - Staying cool during conflict or confrontation - Saying “no” in a way that strengthens trust - Recognizing your stress signals and resetting before reacting - Using micro-wellbeing rituals to stay grounded under pressure These aren’t “nice to have.” They’re core performance skills. And performance takes preparation—mental, emotional, and physical. Want to be the calm in the chaos? Practice like it matters. Because it does. What’s one practiced habit that helps you lead under pressure? #EmotionalIntelligence #CommunicationSkills #WorkplaceWellbeing #SuttleShift