Tradeoffs between authenticity and reputation at work

The exact moment I mentally ended the sales call: 'We'll tell you what employees should say. You just film it.' My response: "That's not employee content. That's corporate ventriloquism." Their counter: "But we need to control the message." The CMO doubled down: "We'll write the scripts. Your job is to make employees look natural saying them." That's when I knew we'd never work together. Because here's what I've learned after 200+ employee interviews: The moment you put words in an employee's mouth, you kill everything that makes their story powerful. We've all worked somewhere like this: - HR hands you talking points about 'work-life balance' - Meanwhile, everyone's pulling 60-hour weeks - And the Glassdoor reviews? They tell the REAL story Candidates aren't stupid. They check both. But it gets worse. The same CMO called me back: "What if we just give them talking points?" I asked: "Why not let them tell their actual experiences?" "Because one might say something off-brand." THAT'S THE POINT. Your employees saying something "off-brand" is called authenticity. It's what candidates and customers are desperately looking for. "I've seen employees share: ➡️ "I log off at 5pm sharp now that I'm a new dad. No shame." ➡️ "Our tech stack is from 2015, but honestly? Our team makes it work." ➡️ "I bombed my first client presentation so badly, I hid in the bathroom after." Those "off-brand" moments? They generated more trust than any polished script. Here's my line in the sand: ✅ I'll help employees tell THEIR stories powerfully ❌ I won't puppet corporate messages through their mouths ✅ I'll capture authentic expertise and experiences ❌ I won't script fake enthusiasm ✅ I'll showcase your real culture (messy parts included) ❌ I won't manufacture a culture that doesn't exist Your employees' unfiltered truth is your competitive advantage. The minute you try to control it, you lose it. I'd rather have 3 clients who get this than 30 who want me to fake it. Because at the end of the day, candidates and customers can smell BS from a mile away. And I refuse to be the one serving it. 💖

There was an experiment where researchers studied what happens when people try to be authentic at work VS when they perform a "work persona”: The goal was to see if authenticity actually mattered for performance and well-being, or if it was just trendy workplace nonsense. But what they found was more dramatic than expected - - The authentic workers didn't just perform slightly better - they had significantly HIGHER engagement (r = 0.37), BETTER well-being (r = 0.40), and were LESS likely to burn out. - Meanwhile, the people performing their "work self" spent so much energy on surface acting and fake behavior that they had fewer resources left for actual work. I think about that a lot when I see companies obsessing over "culture fit" and "professional image”. Most managers assume that if you hire people who can perform professionalism well, they'll naturally be more productive. But the research suggests it's usually the opposite… Performance is exhausting. Authenticity is energising. You can't build a high-performing team if people are spending half their mental energy on ACTING like someone else. Over time, people don't perform to their potential. They perform to what feels SAFE to perform around their colleagues. And what you reward, is what you get…

I’m polarizing. People either like me or hate me. There’s rarely an in-between. I’ve always been authentically Daniel. Whether I’m in a suit in the boardroom or in gym clothes, I don’t switch personas. I’m serious about my professional work and very unserious about myself. I say exactly what I mean, and interpret for those who refuse to listen. I’m empathetic and care about people, while demanding accountability and deterring defiance. I laugh. I joke. I’m dapper. I’m smart. And I adapt. I know those statements make some people uncomfortable. That’s because I’m self-aware and unbothered by the fact that not everyone will like me. I even think the ability to be disliked is a strength—and a pathway to success. To be clear: no one should strive to be disliked. But being comfortable with it frees you to be authentic. To me, authenticity is the ability to recognize your values, beliefs, and personality while still respecting workplace norms and boundaries. One of my favorite examples of this came during an executive job interview with a college president. A former military man, he was curt, direct, and stern. He looked me in the eye and said: “I’ve read your resume. Tell me what you do.” I launched into a polished answer: “I help students succeed.” He interrupted me. I tried again. Cut off again. By the third round, he leaned in closer, sharper this time: “Tell me what you do.” So I dropped the safe persona and gave him the truth: “I get shit done.” He hired me immediately. No hesitation. No follow-up. Just said, “I found my guy.” That moment taught me something: people who truly value authenticity don’t want a résumé, they want the real you. In that situation, blunt honesty carried more weight than corporate jargon ever could. But being authentic has its highs and lows: The Highs: 1) Builds deep trust (people know exactly where you stand). 2) Attracts the right opportunities and the right leaders. 3) Saves time; No energy wasted pretending. The Lows: 1) Some people are allergic to honesty. 2) Authenticity can polarize: you’re either refreshing or “too much.” 3) Many corporate cultures reward conformity over candor. Last month, a mentor of mine put it plainly when I asked why authenticity rubs some people the wrong way: “You’re authentically you. Most professionals have decided to mask their authenticity with a safe, stale persona. They can’t fathom the idea of someone being both authentic AND successful.” That stuck with me. Because at the end of the day, I’ll always take “too much” over “too fake.” The one thing no one can ever say about me is that I’m boring, or lazy, or that I don’t get shit done. How has authenticity impacted your career?

A senior executive once told me, “I don’t do fake coddling—I’m authentic.” This was after an executive team meeting where he publicly tore into someone’s idea with: “This is just lazy thinking as usual. Did you even prepare?” The room fell silent. The person laughed it off, but you could see it landed hard. This executive wore his unfiltered bluntness like a leadership badge of honor and equated it with desirable “authenticity”. And those around him usually felt intimidated and uncomfortable speaking up as a result. Here’s what I’ve learned after working with hundreds of execs: There’s a big difference between being authentic and being unfiltered. One builds trust—the other breaks it. Authenticity isn’t about saying everything we feel. It’s about showing up intentionally and being aware of our impact. It is about being real, but not without genuine connection and care for others. If you’re using “authenticity” as a way to justify careless words, it’s not authenticity. It’s ego with a microphone.

This week, I gave Martin Morales—one of our new sales colleagues—advice that I now regret. I told him to “appear a certain way.” To fit in. To conform to the narrative. My intention was to help him be accepted faster, to reduce risk. But in hindsight, I chose short-term safety over long-term success. And that was a mistake. Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” In staffing and in entrepreneurship, authenticity isn’t optional—it’s survival. Why Do We Keep Conforming? Because conformity often wears the mask of professionalism. In our industry, especially in small firms, the pressure to mimic big players is real. Same scripts. Same cold emails. Same sales talk. Same results: forgettable. The consequences? • Your brand gets lost. • Your people feel interchangeable. • Clients feel like they’re talking to a template. • Culture becomes bland. What We Must Celebrate Instead Authenticity doesn’t mean being loud or rebellious. It means being true—to your voice, values, and point of view. It’s the courage to say: “We don’t chase every client. We serve the right ones.” “We’re not just an IT staffing firm. We deliver DreamHires.” Authenticity is the recruiter who listens, not scripts. The sales leader who qualifies with integrity, not desperation. The company that reflects its real culture—not just what looks good on the website. Conformity = Short-term Safety. You blend in. You avoid criticism. But you’re #invisible. Authenticity = Long-term Differentiation. You polarize. You #stand #out. You attract the #right #people—for the right reasons. In small and growing companies, the win doesn’t come from being bigger. It comes from being real. Martin Morales - discard what I said earlier in the week :-) when I was reflecting on my week I knew I had to right this wrong.

“I was just being true to myself. I call a spade a spade and don’t like to mince words. I don't know why people can't handle #authentic feedback. Everyone is so d**n sensitive nowadays". Sometime back I had overheard this conversation and it got me thinking - in today's corporate landscape, a buzzword is "#authenticity" - bring your whole self to work. I believe authenticity is a powerful tool for fostering trust and collaboration, yet it's essential to remember that it doesn't grant us a free pass to be rude or insensitive to the context. Let me share my take on the 'authenticity paradox' by delving into some examples where people can confuse authenticity with rudeness. Example 1: The Unfiltered Commenter Imagine a team meeting discussing a new project. Kabir, a team member known for his frankness bluntly criticizes a colleague's idea without tact or consideration. He believes that being authentic means speaking his mind. His words come across as harsh and demotivating. The result? Hurt feelings, diminished morale, and a stifled atmosphere. Alternative: Being authentic means expressing your opinions genuinely, but it also involves a responsibility to communicate respectfully. Kabir could have offered constructive feedback without diminishing his colleague's idea. Example 2: The Overly Candid Leader Consider a scenario where a CXO leader, Sanjay, prides himself on his 'authentic, I call it as I see it style'. During a company-wide town hall, Sanjay criticizes a recent company decision publicly, without considering the potential damage to employee morale or investor confidence. This candour leads to confusion, mistrust, and a dip in the company's stock price. Alternative: Authentic leadership is crucial, but leaders need to be mindful of their words and their impact on the organization. Authenticity needs to be tempered with contextual awareness and discretion. There's a time, place for different kinds of conversation. Example 3: The Process Critic In a cross functional meeting, Maya says “The way this team operates is ridiculous. No wonder we’re behind schedule.” She may have a low tolerance for inefficiency and prefers speaking upfront rather than letting frustration simmer. Yet it can be received as a personal attack on team members, causing defensiveness. Alternative: A statement like – “I see opportunities to improve our workflow. Let’s discuss how we can streamline the process.” Overall, I believe authenticity is essential, yet it needs to be tempered with #empathy, #kindness, tact and contextual awareness. It cannot be misconstrued as a license to be rude, ignorant or insensitive. What's your take on this delicate dance? Pic credit - Adam Grant #leadership #unlockpotential #emotionalintelligence

The Worst Thing You Could Be at Work is Being "Just Yourself" People love the advice to "just be yourself at work," but I feel it's more nuanced than that. As leaders, we have multiple authentic selves. There's the version that overthinks decisions at midnight, the one that gets genuinely excited about a new idea, and the one that can guide a team through uncertainty. They're all real but they serve different moments. Leadership has taught me that authenticity isn't just showing up as you are, instead it's choosing which parts of who you are will best serve your team and mission in any given situation. The leaders I respect most (and what I try to practice) don't just "be themselves", they: 1. Read the energy in the room and adjust accordingly 2. Choose words that inspire, not just inform 3. Project steadiness even when they're working through doubt internally 4. Model the resilience they want their team to develop 5. Set standards that stretch everyone toward their potential This isn't about being performative. It's recognizing that authenticity includes the wisdom to know which version of your genuine self your people need right now. The same person who admits uncertainty in a strategy session might need to project confidence when announcing that strategy to the company. Both responses are authentic. Both have their place. How do you navigate showing up authentically while also being the leader your team needs? #LeadershipLessons #MondayMotivation

At 25, I had my dream job. Then came the feedback that would stick with me for years: I was "too bubbly" and "showing my age." …I needed to "tone it down" if I wanted to be well-received in meetings and by colleagues. I don't believe my manager meant any harm. This was corporate America 15 years ago, and the unspoken rules were different. But looking back, I realize how damaging that feedback was—not because it was cruel, but because it asked me to suppress the very essence of who I am. What I didn't understand then, but see clearly now, is that my positive, enthusiastic energy wasn't a liability—it was my differentiator. It's what made me memorable in rooms full of people. It's what helped me build genuine connections with colleagues and clients. The irony? That same "bubbly" personality I was told to hide became the exact trait I'd be praised for in performance reviews at Fortune 50 companies throughout my career. Leaders would specifically call out my positive energy as a strength that lifted teams and drove results. Here's what I've learned: Authenticity isn't about being the loudest person in the room—it's about bringing your genuine self to your work. The workplace has evolved, and thankfully, we're seeing more appreciation for diverse communication styles, different perspectives, and yes, even enthusiasm. To anyone who's been told they're "too much" or need to dim their light to fit in: Your energy, your perspective, your authentic self—these aren't bugs to be fixed. They're features that make you invaluable. The right companies and leaders will see your authenticity as an asset, not a liability. Don't let outdated corporate culture dim what makes you shine.