If your feedback isn't changing behavior, you're not giving feedback—you're just complaining. After 25 years of coaching leaders through difficult conversations, I've learned that most feedback fails because it focuses on making the giver feel better rather than making the receiver better. Why most feedback doesn't work: ↳ It's delivered months after the fact ↳ It attacks personality instead of addressing behavior ↳ It assumes the person knows what to do differently ↳ It's given when emotions are high ↳ It lacks specific examples or clear direction The feedback framework that actually changes behavior: TIMING: Soon, not eventually. Give feedback within 48 hours when possible Don't save it all for annual reviews. Address issues while they're still relevant. INTENT: Lead with purpose and use statements like - "I'm sharing this because I want to see you succeed" or "This feedback comes from a place of support." Make your positive intent explicit. STRUCTURE: Use the SBI Model. ↳Situation: When and where it happened ↳Behavior: What you observed (facts, not interpretations) ↳Impact: The effect on results, relationships, or culture COLLABORATION: Solve together by using statements such as - ↳"What's your perspective on this?" ↳"What would help you succeed in this area?" ↳"How can I better support you moving forward?" Great feedback is a gift that keeps giving. When people trust your feedback, they seek it out. When they implement it successfully, they become advocates for your leadership. Your feedback skills significantly impact your leadership effectiveness. Coaching can help; let's chat. | Joshua Miller What's the best feedback tip/advice, and what made it effective? #executivecoaching #communication #leadership #performance
Best Ways to Give Constructive Feedback During Reviews
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Summary
Giving constructive feedback during reviews involves delivering thoughtful, actionable, and supportive insights to help others grow and improve. It’s not just about pointing out flaws but fostering meaningful conversations that lead to positive change.
- Be timely and specific: Provide feedback as soon as possible, preferably within 48 hours, and focus on clear, behavior-based examples instead of vague statements or personal judgments.
- Highlight intent and balance: Make your intentions clear by expressing support and care for the individual’s success, while balancing critical feedback with recognition of their strengths.
- Engage in collaboration: Involve the recipient by asking for their perspective and brainstorming solutions together to ensure the feedback is a two-way conversation, not a directive.
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Giving feedback is one of the most important jobs of a leader, but doing it in a way that’s both direct and constructive takes some finesse. It’s not just about telling the truth—it’s about doing so in a way that uplifts rather than discourages. Here are a few principles I’ve relied on that can help you give feedback that truly supports growth: ✅Start with care: People are more open to feedback when they know it’s coming from a place of genuine support. Show that you’re invested in their success. ✅Be specific and actionable: Vague feedback doesn’t help anyone. Focus on specific behaviors and offer concrete ways to improve. This helps the recipient know exactly what they can work on, instead of wondering if what you shared was actually feedback or not! ✅Stay future-focused: Feedback should always look forward. Instead of dwelling on past mistakes, keep the conversation centered on what the person can do to improve going forward. Think of it like driving a car: your windshield is bigger than your rearview mirror because there’s more opportunity ahead than behind. ✅Balance challenge with support: Feedback shouldn’t just point out areas for improvement—it should also highlight strengths and superpowers. Striking that balance helps people see what’s working while understanding where there’s room to grow. How do you ensure the feedback you give supports growth? #LeadershipDevelopment #FeedbackCulture #EffectiveCommunication
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As an EY Partner, I gave feedback to thousands. Master the art of feedback - skyrocket your leadership: Bad feedback creates confusion. Good feedback sparks growth. Use the CSS (Clear, Specific, Supportive) framework to make your feedback land without friction. No more awkward silences or sugarcoating disasters: 1. Give positive feedback that actually feels valuable. ❌ Don’t say: “Great job!” ✅ Instead say: “Hey [Name], I really liked how you [specific action]. It made a real impact on [outcome]. Keep doing this—it’s a game-changer.” Why it matters: → Reinforces what actually works 2 Address underperformance without demotivating. ❌ Don’t say: “You need to improve.” ✅ Instead say: “I appreciate your effort on [project]. One area to refine is [specific issue]. A great way to improve would be [solution or resource]. Let’s check in next [timeframe] to see how it’s going.” Why it works: → Pinpoints the issue without personal criticism 3. Redirect someone without crushing their confidence. ❌ Don’t say: “This isn’t what I wanted.” ✅ Instead say: “I see where you were going with [work]. One way to make it even stronger is [specific suggestion]. What do you think about this approach?” Why it works: → Keeps feedback constructive, not critical 4. Push back on an idea (without sounding like a jerk). ❌ Don’t say: “I don’t think this will work.” ✅ Instead say: “I see the thinking behind [idea]. One challenge I foresee is [issue]. Have you considered [alternative approach]? Let’s explore what works best.” Why it works: → Keeps it a discussion, not a shutdown 5. Handle conflict without escalating it. ❌ Don’t say: “You’re wrong.” ✅ Instead say: “I see it differently—here’s why. Can we walk through both perspectives and find common ground?” Why it works: → Creates space for solutions, not arguments 6. Help someone level up their leadership. ❌ Don’t say: “You need to be more of a leader.” ✅ Instead say: “I see a lot of leadership potential in you. One way to step up is by [specific behavior]. I’d love to support you in growing here—what do you think?” Why it works: → Focuses on potential, not deficits 7. Coach someone who is struggling. ❌ Don’t say: “You need to step up.” ✅ Instead say: “I’ve noticed [specific challenge]. What’s getting in the way? Let’s find a way to make this easier for you.” Why it works: → Focuses on support, not blame 8. Give feedback to a peer without sounding like a boss. ❌ Don’t say: “You should have done it this way.” ✅ Instead say: “I had a thought—what if we tried [alternative]? I think it could help with [goal]. What do you think?” Why it works: → Encourages shared ownership of improvement 9. Close feedback on a high note. ❌ Don’t say: “Just fix it.” ✅ Instead say: “I appreciate the work you put in. With these adjustments, I know it’ll be even better. Looking forward to seeing how it evolves!” Why it works: → Ends on a motivating note — ♻️ Repost it to help others grow.
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In my first year as a manager I alienated one of my reports by giving him too much feedback in a direct and pointed way. The feedback was "right" but delivered to bluntly and thus unwelcome. Just because you “can” give feedback doesn’t mean you should. The power of your feedback comes from the trust you build with your reports. Here is how you can build it: The most important thing to understand is that even if you have the institutional authority to deliver this feedback (your title), you need the relational authority before you can deliver it effectively. Read this line again please - doing so will help you avoid either giving pain or making problems for yourself (I did both). This means that your reports need to trust and respect you before they will listen to any feedback you give. You can build this trust and respect by: 0) Being Empathetic I was too blunt. I thought that only being right or wrong mattered, not how I said things or the judgment in my tone and words. I lacked Emotional Intelligence (EQ). How you say things matters, and this means not just the words you say but the real intent behind them. My intention in that early review was not truly focused on helping the person, but rather on scolding him into better behavior. I'm not surprised he reacted poorly to it. 1) Being Consistent Good managers are consistently giving feedback—both bad and good—to their reports. Make sure you are recognizing and acknowledging your employees’ strengths as much (or more) than you are pointing out their areas for improvement. This will make them feel comfortable with you pointing out room for improvement because they know you see them for more than their flaws. 2) Never surprise someone with a review. This is related to point 1. If you are consistently giving small pieces of feedback, a more serious piece of negative feedback should not blindside your employee. They should know that it is coming and understand what the issue is. 3) Deliver corrective feedback ASAP, and use clear examples. As soon as you see a pattern of behavior that needs to be addressed, address it using clear evidence. This gives the employee the chance to reflect on the behavior while it is still fresh in their minds, not months later when their review comes around. 4) Check in to confirm that you are being heard correctly Ask the employee if they understand the feedback you are giving and why you are giving it. 5) Be specific enough to drive change The more specific behaviors and examples you can use to support your feedback, the better your employee can understand that you aren’t speaking from a place of dislike or bias. This also gives them more concrete references to inform their behavior change. Readers—What other ways do you build a relationship before giving feedback? (Or, how have you messed this up?)